First Sight
by jori1413
Summary: A story set in the Marauder's time, follow the life of a witch who befriended the four infamous boys and fought through the first Wizarding War.
1. Chapter 1

Most people would wholeheartedly agree that school is what consumes the majority of a teenager's life. For 9 months out of the year, their only points of conversation have to do with classes; they get their daily exercise by carrying their pounds of books and their social lives consist of the niceties shared with their professors instead of with friends and boyfriends. Late night study sessions are what keep the fatigued, not parties until the wee hours of the morning. That's why summer is the one thing they look forward to.

Summer is what keeps them going, this girl specifically. She can handle school and the work that comes with it during the fall and spring, but once winter hits, she feels like a caged animal just waiting to pounce. See, one person can only sit and read a textbook for so long before hitting the verge of insanity.

This summer was the one before entering her last year of school. While she always tried her hardest to make the summer months off special and fun, she wanted these three to count most of all. Once school was over for good, summer might not feel so exciting, so this one was going to be the best out of all her sixteen, going on seventeen, years.

Now, it was the beginning of June, and she woke up, not to the sound of the annoying buzzing of an alarm, but to the rising sun over her home in Holloway, just outside London. She moved over the sheer curtains covering the window next to her bed to see a beautiful day waiting for her. She started thinking of the things she could do during the day while walking down the stairs and into the kitchen. Her mother was already tinkering around the stove when she made her first appearance of the day.

"Good morning, darling," her mother greeted her, smiling her tired smile. "Would you mind running to the market quickly to get some groceries?"

She agreed and ran upstairs again to make herself look acceptable while her mother wrote up a list. She grabbed a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt from her trunk, having still not unpacked from school, and made her way to the bathroom connected to her room. She made sure to throw her pajamas in the hamper next to the sink, not wanting to make any sort of mess.

After brushing her hair to make it look slightly decent, seeing the blonde flash through the mirror as she turned, she made her way down the stairs again. Her mother had gone to take a shower, but left a list of items she needed and the money to pay for it on the counter. The girl grabbed the pile of paper, folding them each neatly, and put them in her back pocket.

It was warmer than she expected one of the first days of June to be, which just made it all the more beautiful. Leaving her small neighborhood, she stuck to the sidewalk as the streets around her got busier with cars and people. The market was only a few blocks away, so she got there quickly.

The store wasn't full yet. It was early in the morning and lots of people weren't out of school or on holiday yet, so the aisles were filled with just her and a few other wandering souls. She pulled the list out of her pocket and began to load the items for her mother into a small basket provided by the market.

One of the last things on her list was a jar of some specific kind of sauce for her special chicken her mother made on summer nights that they had guests. The girl slowly searched the shelves for the sauce, pausing now and then to indulge her curiosities with other jarred or canned objects. Finally she found the one she was looking for. She reached up to put the sauce in her basket, expecting to see just another jar behind it, but was surprised by finding a pair of eyes instead.

She was startled, to say the least, letting a small gasp escape her lips, but never did more than blink to break the stare. The eyes were gray and bright, but held behind them something mysterious that was hard for her to place. They intrigued her, and she kept her gaze steady to try and break into that something that she couldn't quite see. Their owner never broke the contact, either, except at the very last moment when she could tell they smiled, the corners of their eyes wrinkling slightly. She saw them move to the end of the aisle, and she followed, wanting to find out who the strange person was.

He was tall, to begin with. His black, somewhat curly hair fell over his eyes just a bit. It transformed his face from what might have been sweet and gentle, to a bit dark, yet still strangely charming. His eyes, though, were what still held her attention. This stranger was attractive there was no doubting that, but their whole personality was held behind those wonderful gray eyes.

"Hi," was all he said when they finally stood in front of each other, a slight smile playing on his lips.

She smiled, too, greeting him the same way.

No that they were standing where she could see him well, she realized that she recognized something about him. Perhaps something about his face that she remembered from someone else…However, after examining him a few seconds longer, it occurred to her that she actually knew him from somewhere.

"Do I know you?" she asked him, the smile still on her face.

He looked confused, and she saw him to the same examination of her face as she had just done to him.

"I don't think so…" he responded, his voice deep and gentle.

Still not being able to place where exactly she knew this boy from, she decided to look for some clues. His clothes were simple; he was wearing a plain, dark navy shirt, and jeans, something any normal boy would wear. When her eyes reached his jeans, though, she saw something sticking out of his pocket.

"What's that?" she asked, reaching for the item.

He instinctively stepped backwards and covered his possession with his hand. "Nothing," he responded, the smile falling off of his face immediately.

She raised her eyebrow, suddenly realizing what exactly this sacred item was. While he was looking around to make sure no one was looking at them, she grabbed her new discovery from his pocket and got a good grip on it, right as he tried to pull it from her fingers. She held the long, brown object in her hands, turning it over and inspecting every part of it.

"Give that back," he insisted, trying to pry it from her hands.

She pulled her hands from his reach, and smirked at his nervousness. She held the piece at its base making sure no one was around them, and pointed at one of the cans in the aisle next to her. Muttering something under her breath, the can began to lift upwards, the power coming from the wooden stick-like thing in her right hand. As she lowered it down to the shelf again, she looked over at her new acquaintance.

He looked extremely surprised, and when their eyes met again he questioned her. "Where did you learn to do that?"

"I think there's a slight possibility that we might go to school together," she told him, smiling sarcastically.

He smiled, too, admitting to a sort of defeat and took back his want, putting it where it originally was placed. "Why haven't I seen you around before then?"

"I keep to myself, mostly," she told him, starting to move along the rest of the aisles in the market. "How about you? Are you some sort of lone wolf?"

He chuckled, but itched his nose in a nervous twitch sort of way. "Hardly. I'm Sirius, by the way."

The newly named acquaintance of hers extended his hands to shake her own in a delayed greeting. She put the container of berries that she was examining into the basket that she was holding in the crook of her arm and shook the hand that was waiting for her. "Natalie," she replied.

His hand was a mixture of rough and soft, some parts having calluses and other parts being completely smooth. Sirius' grip was firm but gentle, and somehow she knew this was natural and not practiced. They let go of each other, and she went back to shopping, picking up the last needed item from her mother's list.

"Well," she said, reaching the cash register and unloading her basket so the employee could scan her items. "I'm about done here, but it was nice meeting you."

Sirius nodded in agreement and smiled a little. "Nice meeting you as well. Maybe we'll bump into each other again sometime?"

He said this expecting an answer. She laughed and said, "Maybe."

Taking her paper bags, she paid the cashier, smiled once more at Sirius, and left the market making her way back home.


	2. Chapter 2

A week later Natalie found herself on her back porch, enjoying the summer air and sipping on a cold glass of her mother's homemade raspberry lemonade. The neighborhood she lived in wasn't pretty by any means; it was located right outside the city area, but they still got all the city noise, traffic, and annoying Muggle tourists. However, she always tried her hardest to find the beauty in things. Today, for instance, her exceptionally small backyard smelled lovely, like the freshest fresh air one could possibly find, and was as quiet as it had ever been. To her, time to relax and think was truly beautiful…at least for where she was right then and there.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a distant noise of her home's doorbell ringing. Getting out of her seat, she walked from the porch, through her kitchen and living room and to the front door, opening it without checking who it was. Of course, she already knew who was on the other side, as she was expecting the visitor. A boy about her height and only a little more muscular was pictured behind her screen door. His hair, light and sandy was brushed perfectly out of his face, and his light eyes and face showed happiness and perhaps just a bit of cockiness.

"Hello, Jason," she greeted him, inviting him inside her house.

"Hello, Natalie," he responded, sounding rehearsed. "I'm glad you're back from school, how have you been?"

He went for a kiss on her lips, but she smoothly avoided and gave him her cheek instead. Jason was her boyfriend, basically just for the summer months while she was home from school. She got bored easily when she found herself home alone, which was quite a bit, actually. Her mother worked in a local factory and had to hold down the odd shift with a few other workers, so she wasn't home from late afternoon until late at night. Having a kind-of boyfriend cured most of this loneliness, at least as much as she wanted one person that she never really got to know too well to cure.

"I've been good, thanks," she told him, not bothering to ask him the same question.

Their conversations whenever they spent time together were usually spent like this, awkward and filled with small talk and niceties. It was really like they were almost close friends, not a couple. They would make out sometimes, but had never gone any further than that. She was never all for abstinence and keeping herself until marriage, however she did know that she didn't want to give herself away to someone that she didn't completely love. She wouldn't lie to herself, she did love Jason. But, keeping with the trend of not lying to herself, she didn't love him enough to move their "relationship" to any other kind of level than the one they were at already.

Their first visit of the summer consisted of having a few cookies that Natalie had made a few days earlier, chatting about how their school year went, and a kiss goodnight as she closed the door on him just a little too quickly. Not a complete waste of a night, but she was still let with the feeling that she needed to get up and do something, anything. She made her way upstairs to her room and grabbed a hooded sweatshirt, checking her appearance in the mirror as she did so.

Her blonde hair was as straight as it could get, which consisted of having a little bit of curl to it at the ends, and pinned up by the bangs on one side to prevent them from getting greasy in the late afternoon heat. While looking at her hair, her eyes met their mirror image and she lifted her fingers to smudge some mascara off the corners of her lashes. Her eyes, blue, weren't entirely covered with makeup, but still a little, just to her preference. Satisfied, she zipped up her tight maroon colored sweatshirt over her purple shirt and pulled it down so that it slightly covered her cutoff jean shorts.

She ran down the stairs, excited for the potential adventure she might have under the cover of darkness, slipped on her flip flops and bounded out the door, locking it behind her.

Sticking her hands into her sweatshirt pockets, she walked down her driveway and turned left on sheer impulse. This would lead her deeper into her neighborhood, but who knew what interesting things she would find in there? She walked along the sidewalks at a medium pace, not too fast yet not too slow. Not bothering to stick to an easy path, she followed a lesser traveled one until she heard what sounded like a creek.

That's exactly where she found herself when the path ran its course. She found a picnic table a little more than 20 feet from the shore of the creek and made herself comfortable sitting cross-legged on the top part. The sound of the creek's current was calming, and she found herself in a sort of trance from it. She had no problem just staring at the water flowing downstream, rolling over stones or stray branches every now and then. Every few seconds she would see a fish's head bob quickly above the water's surface, trying to catch a bug to snack on. This made her smile for no particular reason, just because.

Her trance was immediately broken when she heard a branch break in the brush just a few feet away from where she was seated. Her right hand automatically found the handle of her want, and she held onto it tightly. Slowly, she lowered her feet to the ground and lifted herself off of the table, pulling her want out of her pocket and held it at her side, her hand steady as a rock.

Even though she lived in a Muggle community, one never knew what was out there. A person could never be too careful, especially late at night. She wasn't the kind of person that was extra cautious by any means. She took risks like no other; she acted first and thought later. Life is just too short to think about the consequences instead of actually living.

Now, though, it was Natalie against the something that was hidden inside the dark bushes. Yes, risk-taking was her specialty, but she also strongly believed in preserving her life to be able to take more risks later. The bushes hadn't moved since she first noticed them. She was just about to ignore her instincts and try to convince herself that it was all in her imagination when they moved again, but this time the culprit of the noise revealed themselves.

That shaggy head of hair couldn't be mistaken as anyone else's, and she immediately recognized the man that pulled himself out of the forest.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, slightly relieved that the person that was scaring her before wasn't such a threat anymore. Nonetheless, her hand didn't release any pressure from her wand.

She could tell through the darkness that he smirked at her. "I could ask you the same."

He pulled out his wand and her reflexes kicked in immediately, pointing the wand at his chest. His eyes scanned the tip of her wand up to her face, and just laughed.

"Just getting some light," he said, motioning towards his wand. "Lumos."

The tip of his wand lit up with a soft light that made their immediate surroundings brighter. He used his wand to move the tip of hers away from his chest, with that signature smirk on his lips all the while. She quickly glanced into his eyes before deciding that it was safe to return her wand to her pocket. When she looked at him, though, her eyes felt as if they were almost stuck to his. He had a look of amusement, obviously from Natalie making a slight fool out of herself, but also of something she wanted to investigate further.

He saw her glance at him and, if possible, smirked more. "Want to go do something fun?"

She was hesitant at first. She did leave looking for an adventure of sorts, but the idea of potentially having one with a person that she only met about a week earlier made her nervous. "Where would we go?"

He laughed out loud when she asked this. All she did as give him a look of pure annoyance and he stopped.

"Come on," was all he said, extending his left hand for her to take.

In a split second decision, before she had more time to second guess herself, she took it. He smiled what she could only imagine was his most genuine smile, and she felt him pull her hand as he led her back into the brush that he had come from just a few minutes before.

Looking back on this night, she was completely surprised in her behavior. First, she put her trust in a boy she had just met, something that she was never known to do. Who knows what could have happened to her? She could defend herself against the best of them, but with her guards down even a little bit, it would have made fighting back against anything that much harder. Along with that, her wand was planted firmly in her back pocket, where it would take her several seconds to get out and positioned correctly to defend herself. All in all, this might not have been the best decision to make.

But she did make it, and it didn't turn out to be the worst case scenario. Sirius led her through the dark brush and wooded areas that she had never seen before, all the while holding tight to her hand. Even though these places were completely foreign to her, she felt oddly safe with him. She couldn't explain the feeling at all, but she wasn't worried about anything right then.

After about ten minutes of walking, crouching, and pushing through branches in silence, the two of them made their way into a small clearing. Sirius let go of her hand and opened his arms as if he was giving the clearing to her as a gift. She looked around more closely and realized that she had been in this place before. It was dark, and t looked very different, but she could still tell that it was beautiful. The clearing, a fairly small one, was only about 15 meters in diameter, and was cut through the middle by a small and quiet stream, broken off from the larger creek. She had been here with her mother before. They just passed through, but she remembered it especially because of its subtleness and the calm it brought to her when she saw it.

Once Sirius realized that she wasn't as surprised as he thought she'd be, he lowered his arms with a shadowed look of disappointment on his face. It was quickly replaced, though, with his normal smirk. "So you've been here before, have you?" he asked her.

"Once," she replied. "But thank you for bringing me anyway."

He laughed at this, hearing the hint of sarcasm she included in her comment. The silence that followed was a little awkward, only because the two of them really knew nothing about each other, so they couldn't think of something to say.

Instead of trying to make small talk, she made her way down to the small steam, and lowered herself onto the soft grass. She pushed her sandals off with her feet and slipped them into the cool water, feeling the light current flow between her toes. A few seconds later she felt Sirius sit himself next to her, but didn't copy anything after that. His shoes stayed on his feet, and his legs stayed crossed in front of him. She got the feeling that he was a little uncomfortable, though his facial expression made her think twice.

"You have someone, don't you," he asked, after a few more moments of silence.

Knowing what he meant, but still confused, she looked at him for more of an explanation.

"You know," he said, scratching his head in an embarrassed way, "a boyfriend."

"How do you figure that?" she asked, seeing his embarrassment and wanting to push it just a bit further.

"Come on," he scoffed, looking at her as though he couldn't believe she was asking that question.

She kept her gaze with him, as though she didn't understand why he was so incredulous, and he eventually gave in. "Most girls don't act like you when they're around me. So I just assumed you had someone already."

She wanted to laugh out loud at his comment, but refrained. "How am I acting, exactly?"

Sirius rolled his eyes, and leaned back on his hands. "You're acting normal, I guess. Not fidgety or nervous or anything."

This is when Natalie really did start laughing. He looked at her confused this time, and waited a few seconds until her little fit had finished. "What's so funny about that?"

She looked at him without a hint of sarcasm or joking in her eyes. "I'm not acting like that because I'm actually interested in getting to know you. I want to hear what you have to say. The girls who act like that around you are only interested in your looks," she told him.

"Well can you blame them?" he smiled, joking around with her.

A small smile spread across her lips. "No," she said, honestly.

This took Sirius by surprise. He was without a witty comment for a few seconds, though they seemed like hours. When his brain finally formulated what she said, his same smirk across his whole face.

"But I do have someone," she said, not wanting to completely lead him on.

His face immediately fell. She could see the gears working in his head, perhaps trying to figure out how to save face in front of her. She could tell that he had been excited, thinking that she liked him, before she shot him down. However, he recovered quite quickly and his smirk returned.

"That doesn't mean you aren't interested in someone else, though," he said, slyly, seeing how far he could push her buttons.

She couldn't help but let the smile escape to her face. There was no way that she could hide the fact that she thought he was attractive. Yes, she had only just met him, but a person knows when they are attracted to someone. It was his hair and eyes and that damned smirk combined with his easy way of talking no matter what the subject is that drew her to him. "That's true," she eventually answered him.

This made his smirk grow even wider, if possible. He left the conversation alone for a while after this. She assumed he was basking in his own glory by the look of self-accomplishment on his face, and this made her laugh to herself.


	3. Chapter 3

That night ended and passed without anything else happening. She and Sirius ended up sitting and talking about school; favorite classes, friends, plans for after they graduated, and things of that nature. She eventually made it back home at a very late hour, tired but filled with what she thought was just a feeling of excitement from having bit of fun.

Half a week later, she had plans to go out with Jason for a few hours and then have to rest of the day to herself. When he came to her door at noon on the dot, she walked out the door with him and got into his car.

Jason came from a family with money, so, naturally, his car was very nice. It was the newest model, of course, with all the odds and ends attached, nice leather seats and everything working better than it should. With said car, he always brought her to nice restaurants; fast food was never an option. Half of her thought that this was just an excuse for him not to talk to the whole time, as the atmosphere of these places were naturally quiet and a little awkward. On this day, he brought her to one of those stuffy restaurants where she ordered the least expensive thing on the menu and promised herself she'd eat something that was a normal serving size and didn't taste like rubbish when she got home.

A few hours later, after sitting through four courses that equaled the size of a peanut butter sandwich, Jason dropped her off at her front door with a kiss on the cheek as always. Not bothering to watch him drive away, she walked into her house and made a beeline towards the kitchen. After searching her refrigerator a few times, she grabbed some leftover chicken from a few nights prior and ate it cold.

When she was done, she took the remains to the garbage and stuffed it in the bin, rolling her eyes when she realized it was too full for anything else, meaning she had to take it out. So she tied up the bag and took it out the back door of her house. After dropping it in the waste outside, she turned around and her breath immediately caught in her throat.

Sirius was standing right behind her, on the opposite side of the fencing around her yard, and he had nearly scared her half to death. Her hand rose up to her heart, feeling it racing all of a sudden and also feeling the blood rushing to her cheeks, embarrassed. He was laughing quietly to himself, obviously seeing that he had frightened her.

"Stalking me now, are you?" she asked, being able to breathe correctly again.

Chuckling a little more when she said this, he responded with, "Might be."

Natalie raised an eyebrow and made her way to the gate of her fence, opening it and joining him on the other side. He turned around and rested his weight on his elbows, leaning against the fence with a look of pure amusement on his face. It looked like he was up to no good, but that was sort of how he always looked. His shaggy hair was balanced close to one eye, and she had the sudden urge to brush it away, just so she could feel it and see his eyes more clearly. Of course, she resisted her thoughts and pushed them away to the back of her mind.

"So I saw your boyfriend," he said, looking right into her eyes.

She immediately felt as though she shouldn't look back into his, as if she were ashamed that he saw her with Jason. But why should she? Jason was her boyfriend, Sirius wasn't. And she had told him the other night that she had someone. But she also expressed interest in him. Her mind was obviously a mess.

"And?" she asked, being coy.

He smiled, knowing right away that she was playing with him. "He looks like a swell guy," he said, emphasizing ever so slightly the word 'swell'.

"And?" she asked again, the corners of her mouth turning upwards into a smile, along with her eyebrow.

He shook his head, partially from disbelief that she was playing this game, and partially from answering her last question. "Just an observation."

She nodded her head slowly, saying, "I see."

She anticipated a bit of awkward silence between the two of them, but that thought was cut short when Sirius moved closer to her along the fence, leaving only about six inches between them. She looked at him, surprised at how close he got.

"Want to come to a party tonight?" he asked.

Taken aback a bit by his offer, it took her a second to formulate thoughts on it. She had only known Sirius personally for about two weeks now, did she really want to go to a party with him? Well, it might actually be with him, as he didn't phrase his question that way.

"Where?" she asked, pushing her decision back a little until she got more information.

"Nottingham," he responded, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes.

"Nottingham?" she asked, incredulously. "That's nearly three hours from here."

He looked at her as if he didn't understand why she was making a big deal out of this. She rolled her eyes when she realize she'd have to explain herself.

"I can't apparate yet, I'm not of age," she said, laughing slightly.

His signature smirk reappeared on his face. "Really? When will you be?"

"In the winter," she responded, not giving away too much information.

"Then you'll just have to come with me," he said slyly, smiling with an eyebrow raised. "I'll come get you at ten."

Natalie smiled but tried not to show it, failing in the process. She watched him walk across the street and walked to her own door. Before she entered however, she remembered that she didn't know what occasion this party was for. She called after him, "What should I wear?"

He stopped, turned around, and yet didn't answer for a few seconds, contemplating her question. "Something fun," he called back, and started walking again.

As she walked over the threshold, she felt a sense of excitement and anticipation come over her. She couldn't help herself, she ran upstairs to find something to wear and think about how she was going to make up her appearance.

After about ten minutes of rifling through her closet (she had finally unpacked her trunk) she decided on tight jeans with a dark wash and rips and frays all down the front, a somewhat loose white shirt with a complete lace back, and black sneakers. He straightened her hair and parted her bangs far on one side, and did her makeup a little darker than usual. All in all, it was what she imagined a typical party look would be.

You see, she had always kept to herself during the school year, concentrating on her school work rather than gaining a large group of friends. She had never been invited to a party, not that the other students she talked to would be the types to throw one.

Finally the clocked turned to ten and she made her way down the stairs and out the door, money, Muggle and wizard, in her back pocket, and wand in her front. Sirius was just walking down the street as she closed the door behind her, quietly as her mother was already sleeping. She met him halfway in the street. She noticed him look at her outfit subtly, but neither of them said anything.

"You ready?" he asked, holding out his hand for her to hold.

Natalie grabbed it gently and he twisted, apparating them to the party countless miles away instantly, when it would have taken someone several hours driving. The first thing she heard when they settled was pounding music, so loud that people could probably hear it from down the block. The house, very large, was on a hill, and people she had never seen before were scattered around the grass. Sirius, still holding on to her hand, started to make his way up the hill, so she had no option but to follow.

The smell of alcohol immediately filled her nostrils, and the music made it impossible to hear herself think. There were groups of people everywhere and she and Sirius eventually got split up. She felt completely out of place without him, so she found an empty place on the wall and kept quietly to herself, not that anyone could hear her over the noise anyway.

Not long after she settled herself on the wall, a strange boy came up to her. He started talking and flirting, and she became instantly annoyed. She tried to make up an excuse to him to try and leave, but he was persistent, and kept finding a way to ignore her comments. This one sided conversation continued on for about ten minutes. She was starting to think that this would be her whole night when she locked eyes with someone from across the room. She had been looking for something to give her an idea of how to escape this boy's words when she saw Sirius watching her situation from about 6 meters away.

She couldn't escape his gaze; his eyes were mesmerizing even from far away. And from where she was standing, now ignoring the strange boy, she could tell Sirius was slightly annoyed that she was talking to someone else, or rather, someone else was talking to her. When she realized this she couldn't help but smile, because he was jealous of the new guy. He saw her smile, and his face brightened just a little. His smirk reappeared on his face and he motioned to a side door that she assumed led outside, asking her to meet him out there. She nodded, and turned back to the boy who was still talking to himself, tried to make an excuse to leave, but when she realized it wouldn't work she simply walked away.

The door did lead her outside to the side of the house that was surprisingly empty. She looked around in the dark and finally found Sirius leaning against the house, two shot glasses in his hand. When she got closer he handed her one. "Firewhisky," he said. "The guy who threw this party is a friend of mine from school, he brought some."

She took the shot, put the glass to her lips and tilted her head back as she had seen Muggles do in the movies, feeling the scorching hot liquid fall down her throat. It was foreign and unpleasant and she started to cough as politely as possible, trying to make it sound like she was clearing her throat. Sirius had done the same minus the coughing, but looked at her afterwards with a little confusion. "I didn't know you drank," he said, taking the glass form her and setting them both on the ground, moving a little further from the house and away from the people.

"I don't," she managed to say between her coughs, now subsiding slightly.

He looked at her and sniggered. They stopped walking when they reached a completely deserted corner of the castle-like house. She leaned up against the corner, feeling her body find a comfortable place to rest. Sirius leaned against the wall next to her, close but not too close.

"So who was that kid?" he asked, trying not to sound too curious, but more passive.

She laughed a little. "Dunno, I've never seen him before. But he sure tried hard to gain my interest."

Sirius laughed as well. "I can't blame him. Especially with what you're wearing."

Her eyebrows shot up and she said, "You were the one that told me to wear something fun. Did I not?"

"No, you did," he said, smirking once again.

Silence fell over them, as it seemed to always do. She was concentrated on looking over the fencing around the house into the neighbor's yard when she felt Sirius moving closer to her. When she looked up, he was closer than he'd ever gotten to her in their few weeks of knowing each other. Their arms were almost touching. She looked at him with surprise and confusion, not knowing what he had stirring around in his mind. Sirius was around 4 inches taller than she was, so she had to look up whenever she looked in his eyes.

Their surroundings suddenly got quiet and warm, as they were both concentrating on each other. He figured that she wouldn't object, and started to lean in for what she knew was bound to turn into a kiss. She knew what she wanted, but needed to remind him of her situation at home.

"I have someone, remember?" she asked, stopping him when he was about three inches away.

He smirked, and moved one of his hands to the space of wall beside her head. The hair raised on the back of her neck from him being so close. "And?" he asked, mocking her from earlier.

She was surprised so much by this that she gave him the perfect opportunity to swoop in. His lips were warm and soft on hers, and she couldn't help herself. Natalie gave into him and kissed back. She felt herself getting gooseflesh and a tingle traveled down her spine. Her body melted into the brick behind her when one of his hands cradled the back of her neck while the other found her hip. She was so focused on him and the kiss that her hands could only make it to his chest. After a moment or so, but what seemed like hours but seconds at the same time, he let her go, lingering just centimeters from her lips for a few seconds before completely pulling back.

"It's getting late, we should get back home," he said to her, smirking when he saw that she was still in a trance from his kiss.

She simply nodded, taking his hand once again while he apparated them back home. She could feel that her cheeks were flushed, and her whole body was warm, and that she was suddenly much more aware of herself when they settled back on her driveway.

"I'll see you soon," he said, giving her another quick kiss on her lips before he walked away into the dark street away from her house.

He left her standing on the edge of her driveway, not having talked for several minutes. She thought that she was still trying to fully comprehend what had happened when she crawled into her bed that night, falling asleep to thoughts of him.


	4. Chapter 4

Natalie woke up the next day to something tapping at her window. It startled her so much that she jumped right out of bed, her heart racing and searching for the culprit of the strange noise. Outside of her window was an owl, trying to get into her room. Without thinking, she opened the window and let it in, not remembering that she was at home and not at school.

The owl flew in, rustling its feathers while perching itself on the edge of her dresser. She had never seen it before; it was a very light brown with specks of dark within its feathers. Its eyes were kind, yet demanding, so she knew right away to take the letter that it was holding in its beak. She was wondering who could have sent her a letter in the middle of summer when she opened it and read:

_Care to spend the day with me?_

_ Sirius_

She couldn't help but smile. The past few times that had seen each other it had just been chance encounters, but this time he initiated the meeting. She immediately felt guilty, though, as her thoughts drifted to Jason. He was her boyfriend, after all. Her thoughts were interrupted as, who she could only assume was Sirius' owl, nipped her finger nearest to it, telling her to hurry up with an answer.

"Sorry," she muttered, feeling embarrassed under the now scrutinizing eyes of the owl. She scribbled outa response, saying, _you wouldn't be asking me out on a date, now would you?_ She hoped Sirius would understand what she was implying, that he shouldn't because of Jason.

Giving the new letter to the owl, it snapped it out of her hand, stretched its wings and flew out the window, now a little angry that she had taken so long. She decided to jump in the shower, not knowing how long she'd have to get ready for her potential plans, and wanting to be done and ready before Sirius decided that he wanted to leave.

As she left her bathroom, a towel wrapped around her body, she noticed the owl was waiting for her on the same edge of her dresser as before. It now looked extremely agitated, for it had probably been waiting a few minutes for her to notice it. Muttering an apology again, she took the note from it. This time, however, it took flight out her window before she had even started reading, meaning that it must not require a response from her. The letter this time read:

_Of course not. Just a day of fun and excitement. Meet me at my house at 1 o'clock…12_

_Grimmauld Place. _

At the time it was a bit past noon. She had just enough time to get dressed and walk to his house. She dressed herself in a pair of light wash cut off shorts and a fitted t-shirt colored a light blue that bought out the bits of lighter blonde in her hair. Once she was finished with that, and perfecting her appearance in her bathroom mirror, it was thirty minutes past noon which meant that she had to be on her way. Slipping both Muggle and wizard money in her pocket as she descended the stairs into her kitchen, she slipped on her shoes and left her house.

She vaguely knew where Grimmauld Place was; she remembered her mother and herself passing it a few times as they made their way into the city on the rare occasions that they did. Her journey there began by leaving the street that her house was located on and following the main street that led from her small neighborhood all the way to London. She wasn't going that far, thankfully.

After roughly forty minutes or so, she finally reached Grimmauld Place. It was quaint, little houses planted right against each other, encircled with black steel fencing. Some houses featured window baskets with colorful flowers, while others sported shrubs around the doorways. Taking out Sirius' last note, she made sure that she still remembered his address correctly and made her way to the steps of number 12.

Before Natalie could even place a foot on the first step to ascend to the doorway, the door opened and Sirius emerged. He was wearing jeans and a regular looking shirt, nothing extravagant. On any ordinary person it wouldn't have been cause for attention. However, on Sirius it was eye-catching. His muscles were just visible peeking out from underneath the sleeves of his shirt, which made her want to see more. She shook her head slightly, making sure it wasn't noticed by the man she was quietly adoring.

"You're late," he said, joking, making his way down the steps towards her.

She rolled her eyes, saying, "You should be satisfied that I agreed to spend the day with you."

He stopped when he reached the final step, again close, but not too close to her. "You should be satisfied that I invited you," he said, flashing his smirk at her before making his way down the sidewalk.

"Where are we going, anyway?" she asked, conveniently ignoring his comment.

He led her down a hidden trail on the side of his neighbor's house. She followed, still listening for an answer, when they reached the shady backyards of the houses that inhabited Grimmauld Place. He held out his hand once he stopped, expecting her to take it with no questions asked. However, she didn't give him her hand. Instead, she folded her arms together and stared him down, not leaving until she received her answer.

He sighed, exasperated. "I need to go to Diagon Alley. I have a few friends I'm meeting and need to get some things."

Still not satisfied, she asked, "If you already had plans to meet friends, why did you invite me to go along?"

"I figured you'd enjoy a bit of fun," he responded, simply.

Again, he extended his hand towards her, and this time she obliged. Taking out his wand, he twisted quickly, just like the night before, and they were gone in the blink of an eye. When they reappeared, not a split second later, she found herself in the middle of an excitedly busy scuffle of people running every which way. She was surprised that Diagon Alley was so busy at the beginning of July, since school wasn't scheduled to start for almost another two months.

Sirius led her along the main road of the town, dodging hurried witches and wizards, and being careful to step over stray pets. This went on for a good five minutes until they finally ended up at the ice cream parlor. Once they were safely inside, they calmed down. There were no more screaming children or flustered adults, but instead a few people scattered around. The air was cool and calm, and she could feel herself relaxing a little more each second that they were inside. Sirius found a good sized table and sat down, Natalie next to him. Up until this moment he had never let go of her hand.

"They should be here any minute," he said, looking around the shop.

She knew that he meant his friends, however she did actually know who they were. She had heard rumors around school of Sirius and his mates, but she never really paid much attention to them. She was in Ravenclaw and he was in Gryffindor, so she wasn't too concerned with their actions, as they had never affected her.

As her thoughts were dying down, the door to the shop opened for the first time since she and Sirius had entered. He turned his head to see who it was and a grin immediately spread across his face. Sirius lifted his hand and waved it around, signaling to his friends where they were seated. When she heard them arrive at the table, she finally looked up.

Three boys were circled around the table. Separately, they were each normal looking, but, including Sirius, the four of them were a rather odd looking group. The first boy was tall and had a lighter brown hair than Sirius. He looked pale and almost sickly, with a few scars scattered around his face, arms and hands. He gave off an aura of mystery, but also kindness. Despite his initial, and almost frightening, appearance, she was already comfortable being around him.

The second boy was stout, and fidgety. He had short hair, an odd color that she couldn't very well describe. All of his features were a bit pudgy; his fingers were stubby, his legs and arms short, a belly that protruded ever so slightly, and a face full of a nose that was just a bit too short, a mouth that was just a bit too wide, and eyes that were just a bit too cold. She could feel her brows furrow while examining this boy, as they all talked to Sirius, waiting to be introduced to her. There was just something about him that wasn't as normal as the other three in his group, perhaps because his sheer appearance didn't fit in with the others. However, it wasn't her place to judge him, so she pushed the thought out of her mind.

The last boy, the one that was the closest to her, shared a lot of the same physical features as Sirius. He was tall, muscular, and had almost the same color hair. His, however, was messy and short. He wore glasses, but she could see bright blue eyes hiding behind them. He wore the same smirking expression as Sirius always had, and by the way the two were talking to each other, she could tell that they were closer with each other than they were with the other two boys.

As their conversation ended, Sirius looked at her and said, "Do you know any of these blokes?"

"No," she said, shaking her head, almost embarrassed.

He looked at the three newcomers and asked them the same question, with all three responses being the same as hers. "Well," he said, feigning annoyance, "James, Remus, Peter, this is Natalie. Natalie, this is James, Remus, and Peter."

With each name, he pointed a finger at the matching person. They all exchanged awkward waves and mumbled 'hello's. Even though she could tell the three boys were a bit uncomfortable with her presence, they each took a seat around them and started talking to Sirius again. She sat and listened politely, a little uncomfortable herself, not really understanding why she was there with them.

Natalie started daydreaming, no longer paying attention to the boys and their conversation. She zoned out, staring off into space, thinking of anything random that happened to come to her mind. As she finally settle on one thing to think about, instead of several, she felt a hand on her knee. She was startled, but didn't say anything. She looked at Sirius, knowing he was the culprit. He wasn't looking at her, pretended to be completely immersed in his conversation with his friends, but she could see a smirk playing on his lips ever so slightly. She fought the urge to smile herself, thinking that he would just remove his hand in a moment. However, he decided to do the opposite, and she felt his hand starting to move up towards her thigh.

"Excuse me," she said, louder than she had anticipated and looking straight at him.

The conversation around her suddenly stopped, and she realized that no one else knew what was happening under the table. She was incredibly embarrassed at that moment, feeling herself blush but trying to hide it. Attempting to save face, she pretended to continue her sentence, saying, "I need to, uh…the loo…"

She almost hopped out of the chair she was sitting in because she got up so quickly, feeling the need to remove herself from the current situation she had put herself in. He heard the boys chuckle a bit, but decided not to stay and eavesdrop, instead settling herself on a private wall down a ways from the bathrooms.

Sirius, however, stayed seated at the table with his friends. They immediately forgot about Natalie and continued talking amongst themselves. Sirius wasn't directly involved with what they were talking about, so he decided to sneak off without saying anything, following the path that Natalie quickly scurried down not a few minutes before. He found her right away, leaning against a wall, slightly laughing to herself.

When she saw Sirius, she stopped giggling at her now obsolete embarrassing moment and gave him her full attention, though she made certain that he saw that she wasn't exactly happy with him. He stood next to her, mimicking her pose on the wall and just looked at her. She tried to stay angry with him, but once again couldn't help but stare back into his eyes, that little something always hooking her and dragging her in.

"Why'd you leave?" he asked, feigning innocence.

She looked at him as if he was stupid for asking, even if he was pretending. "Why'd you do that?" she asked him.

"Do what?" he asked, pretending again to be free of blame.

Natalie rolled her eyes at him, not bothering to respond. She turned her head to hide the little smile that she couldn't stop from escaping to her lips. When she turned back towards Sirius he was smirking, and she knew that he saw her smile. All of a sudden, she felt his lips on hers. He had leaned in and kissed her so quickly that she barely had time to think, but when she began thinking straight again, she pulled away just as quickly.

"What are you doing?" she asked, her eyes wide.

He looked confused for just a second, before he hid it behind his smirk yet again. "You don't want me to?" he asked.

She knew that she did want him to, that she didn't want him to stop, actually. It was all that she had thought about, even whilst with him, since the night before. She never wanted to stop feeling him so close, his lips on hers, his body heat keeping her warm. But she felt little pangs of guilt now and then, thinking also of Jason, and how she shouldn't be seeing another man.

"I have someone," she told him, repeating once again the phrase he used to ask about Jason a few weeks ago.

True to his nature, he smirked, his eyes glinting with mischief. Even though she had moved away from him, he moved closer to her again. She felt his hand reach her waist, though she was transfixed by his gaze. His hand was warm, and Sirius rubbed his thumb along the hemline of her shorts, very softly touching her skin as well. This small, seemingly insignificant, action gave her chills all the way up her spine, making all the hairs on her neck and arms stand on end.

He moved his face closer to hers, almost leaning in for a kiss, but far enough away to still look into her sweet blue eyes. "I can keep a secret," he said hoping that Natalie understood what he was implying.

Natalie's breath caught in her throat. That one phrase brought about so many things: feelings, emotional and physical, and decisions. It made her like him that much more, just seeing that he seemed to like her even a little bit. Even though she had tried no to chase him, since it was expected that he was chased by girls all through the school year, Natalie couldn't help but become incredibly interested, and very quickly at that. His physical appearance was what dragged her in first, but getting to know him, slowly, yes, but surely, is what made her want to be around him more. Plus, what he said was obviously sexy. It made her heart beat a little bit faster, and she could tell that her cheeks were flushed just a bit.

She didn't say a word in response to his comment, but he smirked anyway, knowing that if he tried to kiss her again she wouldn't pull away. He had caught her and had pulled her in. His charm was irresistible to her, and he liked that he could tell just how interested in hi she was. After a few more seconds of anticipation, Sirius leaned in the rest of the way and kissed her, closing his eyes and releasing a long breath from his lungs.

She was a great kisser; he could feel himself relaxing more and more with every second he spent attached to her lips, which was a different experience for him. He usually never let his guard down so much, though it wasn't fully gone even now. He felt her start to kiss him back, this being the first time she'd really ever done that out of the very few times they'd shared a moment like this. She knew that what she was doing with Sirius behind her boyfriend's back was wrong, and that many people would judge her and see her differently if they ever found out, but at that moment, with Sirius touching her in all the right places, feeling his lips searching for more of hers, she couldn't find an ounce of caring within herself. All she wanted was him, and she never wanted to forget the feeling he gave her, the immediate warmth that passed through her body when he kissed her, his hands gentle but firm bringing her closer to his own body. Her boyfriend was the furthest thing from her mind, the closest being Sirius.


	5. Chapter 5

"Mate, are we going to go do our stuff or did you just come here to snog your new girl?"

Sirius' friend James interrupted them, making Natalie jump nearly out of her skin and turn her head quickly, as to hide her reddened and embarrassed face from her new acquaintance. Sirius snorted as he tried to hide his laughter, but responded to James, agreeing to go with him. Natalie was going to stay put in the quiet ice cream parlor, but Sirius didn't give her that chance, his hand automatically finder hers and pulling her with him.

Even the way he held her hand was different from Jason. Her boyfriend would often hold her hand awkwardly, without interlacing their fingers, his own hand feeling stiff on the palm of hers. It made Natalie uncomfortable and although she didn't much like it, she did it because she knew it was what couples did, and that Jason might like it more than she. Sirius, however, had a much different approach to it. Despite the fact that the two of them were being pulled in the direction of the flow of traffic on the main street of Diagon Alley, he held her hand softly, almost as if he thought he might break it if he wasn't careful. Natalie loved it, and she knowingly tightened her hand around his, making sure that their connection wasn't broken through the throng of people.

Though she didn't know it, Sirius like it, too. His reputation usually preceded him, but not in Natalie's case. He could tell that she kept to herself, keeping her nose where it belonged rather than in other people's business. He liked that about her. It wasn't unusual that when he met a girl, they either didn't give him a chance or the exact opposite, turning into little groupies around him. The fact that Natalie completely treated him like any other person from the first time they met was refreshing, and his attitude was changing because of it.

When the five of them finally reached their first destination of the day, Natalie was already tired of trying to navigate through the giant crowds of witches and wizards. She found herself at the doorstep to the Quidditch store, with the boys gawking at the newest model of broom displayed in the window. Not wanting to stand awkwardly waiting for them to get finished, she snuck back into the crowd right when Sirius released her hand to walk into the shop. Unnoticed by the boys, she went further up the pathway, stopping at a bookstore that was a bit less crowded.

The moment she entered the doorway her senses were thrown into action. She smelled books, old pages and new pages, a scent that she had always loved. Her ears were given a reprieve since the store was quiet and calm once the door to the outside world had closed. Content, she started to move among the books that lined the walls and shelves.

Even though she hadn't yet gotten her list of supplies needed for the coming school year, she knew exactly which courses she was to take, having had many discussions with her Head of House over the last year. Her final year of school was possibly the most important; NEWT testing at the end of the year would ensure that she got into the career path that she wanted to pursue, so, naturally, Natalie had everything about it planned down to the littlest things.

She started picking up books that she knew she'd be needing, happy that she would be getting her shopping done sooner rather than later. Her arms held books on Astronomy, Charms, and Transfiguration, some of the subjects she would be spending the most time and effort on. Her muscles started to strain under the weight of the pile of books growing steadily in her arms. When she finally found the last book that she anticipated needing, she went up to the counter and paid the clerk, who looked very happy at the amount of books she was taking, and even happier at the amount of money he was able to take.

Just before she had turned around with her bags of books lining her arms, someone grabbed her gently around the waist, pulling her in the opposite direction. She immediately went for her want, her reflexes going into effect before her mind could evaluate the situation. One of the hands around her waist grabbed her wand hand, though, stopping her right before she got a good grasp on her want. Natalie quickly turned her head to see that the person behind her was in fact no threat at all.

Sirius was holding her, sporting a devilish grin across his face, gaining some sort of satisfaction from catching Natalie by surprise. "When did you sneak away?" he asked, not releasing her from his hands which were now placed on her lower back, slightly pulling her into him.

"I'm surprised you noticed," she joked, "you were awfully caught up with your friends."

He raised his eyebrows at her comment. "Jealous?"

She showed a smirk of her own when he said this, knowing that he was probably secretly hoping that she was. Sirius liked this playful side of Natalie. He just liked Natalie in general. Her personality drew him in; she was cute, intelligent, and not in the least bit boring from what he'd noticed about her thus far. Plus, she was stunning. She had bright blonde hair that drew out every beautiful feature it could find; she had slightly rosy cheekbones that made it look as though she was always smiling, lips that made him want to always kiss her, and eyes that he couldn't stop staring at whenever they talked.

"If only it was that easy," she replied, keeping one eyebrow raised and a smirk on her face.

He genuinely smiled, rolling his eyes but enjoying her presence nonetheless. "What were you doing in here, anyway?"

With a bit of effort, she raised the several bags that were swinging from her hands, holding books with pages upon pages of valuable information on each one. "Getting school shopping done early."

"Bit of a bookworm, are you?" he asked, poking through the bags and giving the books a look of disgust.

"More like someone who wants to graduate with descent marks," she said, turning towards the door.

They left the store, Sirius by her side. "What do you have left to do?" she asked him, making sure he stayed within her sights through the waves of people.

"Just have to run into another store quickly," he replied, assuring her that they wouldn't be there for much longer.

As they made their way back to Sirius' friends, they landed on the doorstop of a sort of junk shop. Natalie, once again, decided she didn't want to go inside, but instead of completely deserting them she just made her way next door to the Daily Prophet offices. In their front window was a display of that week's headlines, complete with moving pictures and different sized texts. The biggest, though, was of something terrible, that no one could possibly tear their eyes away from. Attacks on Muggles had been occurring all throughout Great Britain. Rogue and dark wizards from their part of the world had started terrorizing the people from the Muggle world, and both parties were taking notice. While the Ministry was trying to take action, the wizards were only followers to something far stronger than the Ministry's employees and Aurors, and evil to top it all off.

Natalie pried her eyes from the paper, not wanting to dwell on these thoughts any longer. Things such as these had started happening over the last few years, slowly and in moderation. Now, however, they were becoming more frequent, and it scared her. She just didn't understand it all; why were these witches and wizards following this terrible man? What did they have against Muggles, Muggle-borns, and basically anyone besides those of a pure blood line? Natalie came from two Muggle parents, so if these attacks kept up, what could she expect in her future?  
Once again, Sirius startled her out of her deep thoughts.

"Are you alright?" he asked, looking genuinely concerned.

The thoughts and fright that Natalie was harboring within herself could be clearly seen on her face. She quickly covered up, making the excuse that the attacks were horrible, and in no way related to her personally.

"It'll never grow into anything bigger than just a few Muggle attacks," Sirius said, saying what he thought she'd want to hear just to wipe the worried look off of her face.

In reality, though Sirius was a pure blood and had nothing to worry about, he was also scared because of the recent attacks. He secretly knew that the dark wizard behind all of that was going to get much stronger before he could even think of being stopped. He knew his parents supported his movements, despite the fact that they didn't openly say it. Luckily, he hadn't stayed with them for a while, having moved in with his best friend James and his family for the rest of the summer, and perhaps longer than that.

Eventually, the group made their way back to where they started, at the ice cream parlor. The five of them exchanged goodbyes, Natalie's being awkward with the three other boys still, but Sirius' being warm and kind. After his friends apparated, he grabbed her hand and twisted the two of them out of Diagon Alley and back to their respective homes. Before she had time to think of anything to say, he gave her a quick kiss and was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

Natalie was being pushed every which way, her hair flying about around her, partially from being pushed and partially from the windy weather. She was having a hard time pushing her way through the crowds of people, with her trunk trying hard to stay attached to her right hand, yet trailing along behind her at a slow speed. She tugged it, making sure it stayed right behind her. It was heavy, but nothing she couldn't handle on her own. The great many people, however, were making it hard for her to try and navigate.

August had come and passed without anything of great interest. Natalie spent many of her days with Jason, and many more of her nights with Sirius, desperately trying to juggle the two romantic relationships in her life. Since Sirius already knew about Jason, not having to keep that information from reaching him was one less thing she had to worry about. The other side of things, though, was where the trouble was. Jason had no idea she was seeing Sirius along with him, and she didn't exactly want him to find out. Though, Sirius, being the prankster that he was, certainly gave her a run for her money. He would send her owls whenever he knew that she and Jason were together, trying to cause trouble between the two of them for his own amusement. This always resulted in a swift slap to the hand the next time Natalie saw him and a furious outburst of laughter from him.

Now, she was trying to find her way to Platform 9 ¾. She had already gone through the slightly sad process of packing her things and saying goodbye to her mother, and was now excited to get onto the Hogwarts Express and start her final year of school. She hoped that great things would happen during her last year; perhaps she would learn a plethora of new spells and charms, pass her NEWTs with flying colors, and have great stories to tell from all the fun adventures whilst roaming the halls of Hogwarts. She could just feel the excitement permeating her mind when she finally reached the barrier between the Muggle and wizarding worlds.

Taking off on a bit of a run, she made sure her path was clear and no Muggles were staring directly at her when she made her way through the seemingly solid barrier, and settled on the other side. The giant steam engine was making many exhilarating noises, clouds of steam billowing from the front of the train. She smiled, knowing that she was that much closer to being within the walls of her beloved school again. Despite the massive work load she took upon herself during the year, she loved being at Hogwarts. It was a truly magical place, and she made sure to never take her luck at being there for granted.

Boarding the train, she had an easy time finding a compartment that was empty for the time being, as everyone was saying goodbye to their families outside. She somehow moved her trunk to the shelving above her chosen seat near the door, regardless of the fact that it was almost twice her weight. Inside her trunk, she had all of her robes for school and Muggle clothes, her new textbooks for the year, rolls upon rolls of parchment, numerous quills and bottles of ink to match, and other things that she knew she would want or need throughout her next several months away from home. They were all packed neatly, each having a specific place so she knew exactly where to put it when she got to her dorm to unpack.

One by one, random students of all ages started filling the compartments around her. Natalie was by no means rude, so she kept the door next to her wide open, inviting anyone who wished to come in a place to sit for the next few hours. However, she was still a bit shy when it came to talking to brand new people, so she buried her face in her Charms book, looking up whenever someone new entered, and shooting them a quick smile.

Soon enough, the train started moving. She smiled to herself, happy that they were finally on their way. The other students in the compartment with her were presumably friends, as they were all chatting amongst themselves. Three girls and two boys; their specific houses were indefinable because of their Muggle garments, however they looked to be in about their third or fourth year. They paid no attention to Natalie, and she was fine with that, as she had just discovered a spell in her book that she was now itching to try.

Because she was so deeply immersed in her book, she hardly noticed the compartment door open next to her a while later, not bothering to look up at the new visitor. She assumed it was for the younger students sitting with her, as they seemed to be far more popular than she was at that age, and even was at her current age.

"There you are," these words were said by a very familiar voice. "I thought I'd never find you."

The talking that Natalie had been toning out suddenly made her take notice, as it had abruptly stopped when the compartment door had opened. She looked up and saw Sirius dressed in dark brown pants and a nicely knitted sweater, looking down at her, his eyes bright and smiling.

She smiled at the sight of him, for simply his presence brought her happiness now. "I was never lost," Natalie said, folding down the loose corner of the page she had been reading sot that she might be able to find it at a later date.

"You right well could have been, I've been looking long enough," he said, now leaning against the door frame.

The five people in the compartment with them still hadn't continued their conversation. She looked over at them and saw, to her surprise, that the boys were glaring at Sirius, and the girls looked as if they hadn't ever seen something so amazing. Her eyes widened as she had never seen such a sight before. The girls were almost gawking at Sirius, and he was completely oblivious.

"Why was it so important that you find me?" she asked, now awkwardly trying to ignore the stares from the five perfect strangers.

Sirius seemed to have no idea what was going on around him. "I was going to see if you wanted to come sit in my compartment," he said. "I'm actually a bit surprised you didn't' go there first."

"Well I wasn't invited, was I?" she retorted.

He smiled and rolled his eyes, and added a small chuckle. "Consider this your invitation, then. I'll grab your trunk."

And with that, he pulled her off of her feet and tugged her trunk from over her head, lifting it with such ease that one would assume it only weighed as much as a sickle. Natalie stole one more glance at the others in her compartment, and saw that the boys looked relieved but that the girls looked incredibly disappointed. She sincerely hoped that those reactions to Sirius' presence wasn't common to the rest of the school's population.

Natalie mostly stuck to herself during school. She didn't have any best friends to share gossip and stories with; while she had a few acquaintances, she didn't feel the need to get close with anyone. She spent her time in the library, under the shade of one of the trees by the Black Lake, or in her dorm or common room, always with her nose in a book or her quill on some parchment. Because of this, her marks on exams were always high, and she never turned in an assignment late or with less than perfect work. This is most likely why she got sorted into Ravenclaw, for she was smarter than most and took her schoolwork very seriously.

Once the two of them got out into the corridor and shut the compartment door behind them, Natalie asked him if he had noticed the stares he was getting from the younger students.

"I get it all the time," he said, being cocky but also completely honest.

She rolled her eyes but decided against saying anything else on the subject. However, he saw this action and said, "Don't worry, love, they're nothing compared to you."

While she knew very well that he was joking with her, she didn't like that he called her 'love' for some reason. It didn't make her uncomfortable, or give her fluttery feelings in her stomach; it made her a bit angry. She couldn't place why, though, which made her all the more annoyed.

"Don't call me that," she said, trying not to sound as cold as she might have felt.

Sirius looked at her, and she could tell that he was surprised by the tone in her voice. But once again, true to his nature, he just smirked, not letting anything get to him.

"Why not? Does your boyfriend call you that?" he asked, a twinkle of trouble in his eye now.

"He might," she replied, looking not at him but straightforward in the corridor.

Truthfully, Jason didn't really call Natalie anything but her name. No nicknames or terms of endearment were present in their relationship; it was all very formal and planned, nothing ever out of the ordinary.

Sirius grinned an evil grin when she said that, knowing that she was completely lying. He didn't hesitate to point this out. "So if your boyfriend doesn't call you that, why can't I?"

Natalie furrowed her brow, frustrated that he wouldn't let this topic go. "Frankly, Jason may call me whatever he likes. You, however, are not my boyfriend, therefore you don't have the proper authority to call me such names."

He laughed loudly at this, sounding like a bark that echoed down the empty corridor. "I think I might do it anyway," he said, challenging her.

"I should hope you wouldn't," Natalie said, stopping in the middle of the hallway and looking at him like he was mad.

All Sirius did was smirk at her. "See, I don't necessarily like your boyfriend. So just out of sheer spite, I believe I'll continue calling you that."

"You've never met him, how on earth would you know if you like him or not?" Natalie asked, already knowing what his answer might be.

He raised an eyebrow. "He has you all to himself, doesn't he? I think that's a perfect reason not to like the bloke."

"You have me all to yourself right now," she said, motioning to the empty corridor. "I don't see anyone else here with us."

"He gets you whenever he wants. I only get you in secrecy," Sirius said, moving closer to her.

"That was your choice," Natalie said, her voice getting lower, just in case anyone was listening.

Not that anyone knew Jason, she still wanted to make sure that he couldn't find out about Sirius. Natalie wasn't necessarily afraid of breaking his heart, or hurting him in any way; she knew that he'd be fine if she broke up with him right now. He'd move on to someone a little better suited for him, and they'd both live just as happily without one another than if they stayed together. But she also liked having someone back home to mask the sting of loneliness she felt every now and then. Perhaps it had something to do with comfort; they'd had almost the same ritual for a few summers now, and it was a bit comforting to her.

No, what she was most afraid of was the confrontation. Jason was an overly polite boy, yes, but Natalie also knew that he had a hidden temper within him that was sure to rear its ugly head at the revealing of Sirius. The male species was a completely unpredictable one; many boys seemed fine and innocent, but in secret had terribly mean sides to them. She didn't very much like the idea of the fight that was bound to happen between her and Jason because of her actions. He frightened her when he got severely angry, as he did every once in a while.

"I never said it wasn't," he responded, "or that I regret it. I rather enjoy what we have, actually."

She narrowed her eyes at him, not too sure what he was getting at. All he did was chuckle and smirk, almost as if he was hiding something. "Don't worry, love."

Natalie rolled her eyes as he put heavy emphasis on the word 'love'. She supposed there was nothing that she could do about it now. She had quickly learned that when Sirius was challenged, he stuck with it for an incredible amount of time, far past when one would expect him to forget about it. If she said anything more on the matter, he would just take it as more of a challenge, and she didn't want that.

They finally reached Sirius' compartment and made their way inside. His friends Remus and Peter were seated and talking to each other, but there was no sign of James. Thinking nothing of it, she quickly put her Charms book back into her trunk and allowed Sirius to lift it above her head again and onto their shelving this time.

Sirius sat down across from Remus and Peter, Natalie settling herself down beside him. He immediately snaked his arm around her waist, knowing that his friends already knew about her, and feeling certain that they wouldn't tell a soul if he asked them not to. It didn't feel awkward sitting with his friends and Natalie. She didn't fidget when he held her close, which was a relief from many of the other girls he had once dated. He talked to her easily, and worked her into conversations with his friends, wanting her to be comfortable around them.

As their conversations drifted from one thing to another, time slowly ebbed away, the train moving them ever closer to the castle. Eventually, James found his way into their compartment, his face downcast and melancholy.

Natalie looked to Sirius for some indication as to why James looked so sad, yet all he did was subtly roll his eyes. "Mate, what happened?" he asked, despite his apparent exasperation.

James waved his hand absentmindedly, dismissing Sirius' question automatically. "Evans," he muttered, deep in thought already.

"Lily Evans?" Natalie asked, emphasizing the word Lily.

All four boys furrowed their brows at her question, becoming slightly suspicious, James the most. "Yeah…" he responded, leaving his answer open ended, encouraging Natalie to explain herself.

"Just wondering," she mumbled, mostly to herself.

Sirius wouldn't have such a vague answer from her, though. He was far too curious. He and Lily Evans weren't great friends by any means, but James was madly in love with her and he therefore was very interested. "Why?" he asked Natalie.

She sighed, not having expected to have to divulge such information to people she barely knew. "She's just not my favorite person is all."

"Why?" Sirius asked again.

She sighed once more, annoyed. "We've had many classes together," she explained, "and she's very competitive, as am I."

The corners of Sirius' mouth twitched as he tried to hide a smirk, but dropped the topic as he saw it was frustrating her. Remus went back to talking to Peter, yet his face was fixed in a silly smile as well. James appeared as if he hadn't paid much attention to the conversation. Thankfully, Sirius changed the subject to something more lighthearted, which carried on until the train reached the Hogsmead station.


	7. Chapter 7

Attempting to walk out of the Great Hall after the welcoming feast was always an event. During the regular school days everyone would eat their meals at different times depending on their class schedules, so the hall was never as full as it was on the first and last days of school.

Because of this, Natalie was having a difficult time getting to the Ravenclaw common room. Miraculously, she somehow got out of the hall without bumping into too many people, but her luck ended once she reached the main stairs. Right when she turned, she ran into a dark haired boy who was knocked to the ground as a result. She immediately offered him her hand to help him up, but he denied it.

"I don't need your help," he started to say, but when he looked up at her he stopped.

Natalie furrowed her brows, confused at his tiny outburst. He pushed himself off the ground and she got a good look at him for the first time. He had the dark hair she saw at first, but now she saw that it was expertly styled, not a stray hair in sight. His robes signified that he was in Slytherin house, which explained why he was so hostile to her at first.

He brushed off his robes as if he had been a part of a large scuffle and looked her in the eye, saying one more thing before he stalked off. "Say hello to my brother, would you?"

As the strange boy walked away Natalie stared after him, suddenly not able to move. Say hello to his brother? She started to slowly walk up the grand staircase, trying to put this new equation together. She had never met the boy before, so at first she was quite certain that he had mistaken her with someone else. But eventually, as she ascended ore and more steps, she slowly started to recognize certain parts of physicality. The hair reminded her of someone she must have known, and his eyes…

Right as she was starting to come to a complete realization, someone grabbed her from behind and pulled her into an empty hallway. Natalie heard herself gasp and pulled herself from the person's grip, turning and staring into the same gray eyes as she had seen from the mystery boy not a few minutes before.

"Are you alright?"

It took Natalie a moment to realize that Sirius was standing before her. _Say hello to my brother for me, would you?_

"Do you have a brother?" she asked him abruptly.

The look of confusion that masked his face was immediate. He didn't answer right away, instead taking a moment to look at her as if she was up to no good. She stared back at him, awaiting his answer.

"Yeah, what's it to you?" he retorted.

"Well, if I'm not mistaken I've just met him," Natalie responded. Sirius' eyebrows shot up in surprise. "And he asked me to tell you hello."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Of course he would say something like that, the sarcastic little brat."

Natalie didn't think of this so lightly, though. "How does he know about us, Sirius?" she asked, motioning to the two of them. "We're supposed to be keeping this a secret."

"He must have caught me sneaking out one night, or saw us on the train. I don't know, really. Don't worry about it, he doesn't know your boyfriend," he assured her, rolling his eyes again and saying 'boyfriend' with slight disgust.

Natalie looked around the dark hallway, noticing that there were less and less students filing to their dorms. She decided to trust Sirius and let out the small breath she had been holding. Sirius saw her relax slightly and smiled a genuine smile. He grabbed her hand and dragged her out of the hallway towards a set of stairs.

"Where are you taking me?" Natalie asked. "My common room is the opposite way."

"Trust me, I know where your common room is," Sirius laughed, smirking at her from over his shoulder.

She hopped over a stray textbook as Sirius was pulling her quickly along behind him. "Why on earth would you know that?"

He stopped suddenly in front of a small door leading to a broom closet. "You really don't know much about me, do you?" Sirius asked, a small smile tugging on the corners of his lips.

Natalie blushed slightly and looked around, hiding her face, knowing fully that he was joking but still agreeing with what he said. Neither of them, in fact, knew each other that well. Yes, they had learned a few things during the summer holiday, but certainly not as much as if they were a normal couple dating. Yet, at the same time, she thought it was good that they didn't know each other as much as they probably should have. It made their, for lack of a better word, _relationship_, simpler. The less they knew about each other, she though, the easier it would be to keep everything a secret.

Sirius let the smile overtake his face, seeing Natalie blush despite her attempts to hide it. He turned the handle of the door and pushed it open, pulling Natalie inside with him. It was dark in the closed and filled to the brim with all sorts of magical cleaning equipment. He turned over a bucked and sat on it, pulling her close to him.

"What are we doing in here, Sirius," she said, forming it into more of a statement than a question, a small smile playing on her lips as well as his.

"Well, since you and I are in different houses and won't get to see each other whenever we want like we got used to during the summer, I figured we could use this closet to see each other," he said, interlacing his fingers in hers.

"Assuming Ravenclaw and Gryffindor have any classes together this year, don't you think we'll see each other then?" she feigned innocence.

Sirius rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that evening, his smile growing bigger as he pulled her closer. "Well I meant more privately in here, but if you don't mind everyone else seeing us snogging then I suppose it doesn't matter…"

Natalie sighed at him as he smirked at her, and let him pull her down onto his lap. They were a sight to be seen, Sirius with his dress shirt un-tucked and his tie loose while Natalie, with her shirt tucked, perfectly pressed skirt and stocking-clad legs crossed ever so lady-like, sat on his lap running her fingers through his hair.

Sirius loved being with her. She made him feel so relaxed, and even though they'd only known each other for a small amount of time, he felt as though he could tell her anything. He wanted to tell her anything and everything, and now that they'd be in constant contact, he hoped he'd get the chance and that shed feel comfortable enough to tell him anything and everything as well.

He placed his hand on the back of her neck and pulled her into a kiss, brushing his lips across hers softly at first but then more passionately. She, of course, returned the kiss, feeling the familiar rush of blood reach her face, and the tingle of excitement run down her spine. They soon became lost in each other's embrace and stayed in the broom closet for what seemed like hours, and probably was.

The first week of classes had gone smoothly, as it always did for Natalie. She was only taking five classes as they were all very advanced because of NEWT testing at the end of the year. Monday's Transfiguration class was shared with the Hufflepuffs, as was Thursday's Charms class. Thankfully, the only class shared with the Slytherins was Tuesday's Astronomy class, yet it didn't matter to her because it was the one that was most important to her, so she wouldn't let other students bother her. Which then left her Wednesday and Friday classes, Care of Magical Creatures and Defense Against the Dark Arts with the Gryffindors. She was quite excited, actually, about being in two classes with Sirius and his friends. It tickled her pink to potentially be able to get higher marks with every spell they would learn.

Now, though, was Saturday. The much needed weekend couldn't get to Hogwarts quickly enough for many students, and, as Natalie didn't have much homework from the first week, she planned on spending a relaxing weekend at the castle doing whatever she pleased. At the moment, she was in the Great Hall having just finished arranging the space she had in her dorm in the way she had perfected over the years. As she quietly ate her boiled oats and fruit, the mail started to flow through the door, stopping at many different students to deliver packages and letters.

A strange owl stopped in front of Natalie, knocking into her orange juice ever so slightly so that it teetered on its side and caused a little to dribble down the glass. She pursed her lips disapprovingly at the clumsy owl and snatched the letter it held out to her, making sure it knew to leave immediately.

The letter was addressed from her mother and so she opened it without hesitation. Inside there was a small note and a much thicker letter. The small note was from her mother, asking how she was, hoping to hear from her soon, and also saying the letter was from Jason and that she'd be happy to give him Natalie's reply.

Natalie thought this was odd, as Jason almost never wrote her letters, much less asked her mother to send them to her at school. More suspicious this time, she opened the two page letter and started to read.

_Natalie,_

_ Your mother has told me that you've arrived at school safely, and without any_

_trouble. I hope you are doing well in your first few weeks. School for me is going just fine. _

_ I realize that my writing to you is a tad confusing, as I often never do so. The true_

_nature of this letter is that, whilst visiting with your mother a week or so ago, she offered_

_me a bit of interesting information. She said that throughout the entire summer holiday_

_you had been, and I quote, "hanging around with a rather lovely looking dark haired _

_boy." _

_Natalie, I sincerely hope this is not true, and it is really just another one of your _

_mother's silly drunken sightings. And although one should not trust your mother _

_with such gossip, you were rather distant through the holiday and I am very suspicious. I _

_do not like to be toyed with. _

_ You should consider yourself forbidden to do such a thing behind my back, or _

_with my knowledge for that matter, again. I do not need to be associated with someone _

_who may or may not be acting in a way that makes me look less refined than I am. I _

_should hope you will apologize and begin to hold yourself to higher standards _

_immediately. _

_ My regards, _

_ Jason_

Though to the naked eye the letter might have looked respectful as ever, Natalie knew that Jason was beyond angry. She was thankful that she was not at home at that moment, for she would be subjected to hours of lecturing from him while she pretended to listen.

So he knew about Sirius. Natalie silently, and very sarcastically, thanked her mother for bringing this new problem about. However, she put the letter away with her school books and resumed her eating, though her appetite was slightly less than before. Jason couldn't reach her at Hogwarts, so therefore she had nothing to worry about until she traveled home for the Christmas holiday.


	8. Chapter 8

Natalie's heart was racing. She had her wand held out in front of her and was walking extremely slowly as to not attract anyone to her whereabouts. She took one small step, and then another, and when she lifted her foot to take yet another, something loud clattered beneath her. Her breath caught in her throat. She lit her want and held it to the ground, seeing a now broken Remembrall scattered on the floor.

"Hey," Sirius whispered beside her, "if you expect to be invited again, you'll do well to keep quiet."

Turning her head towards his voice, she saw through the shadows that he was smirking at her, poking fun at the fact that she had made an excessive amount of noise.

The two of them were on their way to the kitchens, as Sirius had a terrible urge for a midnight snack. He caught her after she had finished her dinner in the Great Hall and told her to meet him in their usual spot at 11:30. While she was wary, and most definitely wouldn't have done anything to break the school rules if it weren't for Sirius, she still made her way to the broom closet on time and hid herself inside until she finally saw her partner.

Now Sirius was leading her down a dark hallway, making sure he had one eye on Natalie the whole time. He knew she was nervous but was beyond happy that she was still there with him. He was one of the biggest troublemakers at Hogwarts and was excited that he had someone new to share some of his secrets with. He and his friends had often found themselves bored of doing the same old thing every night, but now they had gotten the idea in their heads that they could train Natalie to become the same kind of mischievous meddlers that they had learned could be so fun.

Natalie was following behind Sirius diligently, practically stepping in his footsteps. While she was up for any and all kinds of adventures during her summer holidays, she never dared do something to cause any trouble during the school months. But there was just something about Sirius that made her keep following, despite her brain telling her it was a terrible idea. Anyway, she might as well do something crazy. It was her last year at school, after all.

Sirius abruptly pushed her aside against the wall, flattening himself against her and quietly scooting them into a doorway. Natalie gasped and whispered something about being insulted by him being so forward, but he gently put his hand over her mouth to silence her. He motioned his head towards the hallway they had just been creeping through and she saw exactly why they were suddenly hiding. A professor was walking as if they were in a trance, reading off of a piece of parchment and paying no attention to the rest of the world.

Natalie couldn't help but let a little giggle escape her throat. The situation they were in was suddenly hilarious to her. The professor stopped in his tracks; he had heard Natalie's laugh. Sirius tightened his grip around her mouth, telling her silently to stay quiet. Putting the parchment down to his side, the professor looked around him, all of a sudden aware of his surroundings. Rolling his eyes and shaking his head slightly he walked away, most likely convincing himself that it was just a painting or a ghost trying to play a trick on him.

When he was gone Sirius looked down at Natalie and removed his hand, raising his eyebrows at her in a 'what the hell were you thinking?' sort of way.

"Sorry," she said, "I didn't know he would hear me."

He lowered only one eyebrow, now looking at her as if he didn't believe her. Natalie rolled her eyes and tried to push him off, intending to keep moving down the hallway, but he didn't budge. Instead, Sirius moved one of his hands down to her hip and put the other one by the nape of her neck, keeping her still against the doorway.

"Weren't we in the middle of something?" Natalie asked, getting nervous that they would really get caught if they dawdled any longer.

"The whole school is sleeping," he told her, holding her gaze though she tried to break it. "We've got plenty of time to do whatever we like."

As Natalie sat in class, staring outside the window next to her and daydreaming while gazing at the blustery late November afternoon, her thoughts went back to that night. She had been certain at the time that it would not be the last time she'd be sneaking back into her dorm at ungodly hours of the night. It turned out that she was right; just the night before she had arrived in the Ravenclaw common room just a few hours before the sun was set to rise, with her clothes on crooked and her hair disheveled. It made her smile a secret little smile to herself, knowing that she and Sirius were the only ones who would know about their little escapades. That is, if he hadn't already shared with his friends.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the professor declaring that class was over, and asking students to please write down the essay prompt and to actually write and turn it in. When Natalie finally snapped back to reality, she grabbed her textbook and hurried to catch up to Sirius and his friends. Remus was telling James about that day's lesson, obviously annoyed that his friend hadn't paid attention at all.

Natalie was smiling at their humorous conversation when she started to feel odd. She stopped walking, trying to figure out what was missing, when she realized that she had left her bag back in the classroom. She turned around and started back to the class when Sirius jumped in front of her.

"I'll get it," he said, hoping that his chivalry would impress Natalie.

It did, and she smiled as she leaned against the wall to wait for him. A minute later Sirius reached the classroom and bent down to see under the desks, looking for Natalie's beige colored bag. Finding it after a few seconds, he grabbed it and swung it over his shoulder. However, the flap wasn't completely shut and the majority of Natalie's belongings showered to the floor, rolling every which way. Sighing, unhappy that his time would be wasted when he could be with Natalie and his friends, he bent back down and started putting things back into her bag.

Something caught his eye immediately. It wasn't a quill or a roll of parchment, not even a small book for reading between classes, all of which Natalie had stuffed in the bag. No, it was a letter. The thing that was so different about it, though, was that it was written on Muggle paper. His eyes narrowed, recognizing the handwriting on the envelope to be a male's; he had an idea of who wrote it.

Though he knew he shouldn't, and every ounce of his brain was telling him to put the damned letter back into her bag, his need to snoop was greater. He opened the letter and started to read, his brows furrowing lower with every sentence. Sirius could feel his anger starting to bubble somewhere deep inside him. How dare this prat say such things to her?

Right as he finished the letter, Natalie walked in. "What's taking you so long?" she asked, but cut herself off as she saw what he was doing.

Sirius watched as her face fell from happy to confusion to anger. "Were you going to tell me about this?" he asked her, waving the paper carelessly at her.

Natalie narrowed her eyes at him, wondering what he was getting at. She was automatically angry with him for sneaking through her things. "No," she replied, not taking her eyes off of him.

Truthfully, she had almost completely forgotten about the letter that had surely found its way to the bottom of her bag. Before it had been forgotten, however, she really had no intention of telling anyone. Actually, she fully planned on ignoring it until it was bound to be brought up by Jason during the winter holiday. She wasn't even going to send a response back to him, maybe she'd even pretend she hadn't gotten it, or just simply making the excuse that school was too vexing and time consuming to respond.

Sirius was taken aback by her honesty, and felt a bit hurt by it. He felt his mood darken with every passing second. "Are you at least going to tell him off?" he asked, feeling as if he was grasping at straws with Natalie.

Natalie rolled her eyes, already exhausted with the bickering between the two of them. "I wasn't planning on it, no," she told him, leaning on the doorway against her folded arms.

Sirius' eyebrows shot up in surprise. Why wouldn't she tell him off for the things he said to her in that letter? The guy was obviously deserving of a bit of verbal harassment in return. He knew that if he were to see that git right at that moment that he wouldn't be able to stop the words that would come out of his mouth. How could he even bare to say those things to her? It would kill Sirius to even think such things about Natalie.

"Are you completely unaware of the things he called you in this letter?" he asked, angry with her naivety.

Natalie raised one of her eyebrows, daring him to say his thoughts out loud. In any other situation Sirius might have had enough sense to hold his tongue, but at this moment he was simply too fired up to mind his manners.

"Well he's calling you a slut, isn't he?" Sirius practically yelled at her.

She clenched her jaw, hating that he said it. Natalie knew exactly what Jason had been trying to call her in the letter, but she was planning on fully ignoring that part of is rant. To hear it coming from Sirius, though she knew he was just repeating the meaning behind her boyfriend's rude letter and didn't mean it in his own mind, it hurt her. Her subconscious had been calling her that, plus a slew of synonyms, since she stared seeing Sirius, but Natalie had somehow been pushing the thoughts away, until now, of course.

"What does it matter to you?" she snapped at him, now very angry.

He looked at her like he couldn't believe the words coming out of her mouth. His mind was working so hard trying to keep himself calm and to think of words to say to her without rupturing something in his brain. "Nat," he said, using the shortened version of her name that he had recently started using in hopes that it would calm her down. He really was only doing this because he cared about her. "It's not right that he can just get away with saying that. I would never – I don't ever say those things to you."

Natalie pursed her lips, keeping in most of her thoughts. She knew he was trying to get her to understand, but he had somehow, somewhere, crossed an invisible line into a part of her life that she didn't think he belonged. When she was with him, she didn't want to think about Jason. She knew it was wrong what she was doing, and now it was as if it was being thrown back in her face. Her subconscious was yelling 'I told you so!' from the highest mountains of her mind, and it was upsetting her terribly.

"I don't think it concerns you any," she finally said after a few seconds, much quieter than before.

"It concerns me completely," Sirius said, his voice low. "You're my-"

But he stopped himself, realizing what he was about to say. Natalie's eyes immediately shot up to his, and she felt as though she was on fire. The anger that she had been holding in the past few minutes of arguing pushed itself out of her at last and it was directing itself right at Sirius.

"I'm your what?" she snapped, loudly.

She watched him intently as he opened and shut his mouth several time, out of things to say. His brain had suddenly taken a hiatus from sending signals to his vocal cords, and he couldn't think of the right thing to say much less anything at all.

"I'm your what, Sirius," she said again, still loud and as less questioning than demanding an answer.

He held her gaze for a few seconds, trying his hardest to send his thoughts to her somehow, but then dropped his eyes to the floor. He bit his bottom lip, willing himself to stay silent, hoping that she could find something within him to help calm her down and see what is intentions really were in confronting her about the letter.

She couldn't see reason at that moment, however. She was full of every kind of rage known to man and was seeing red.

"I'm your nothing, Sirius," she said, spitting the word 'nothing' at him. "You were the one that said we'd keep it a secret."

"I know what I said," Sirius spat back at her, defending himself.

"Good," she yelled. "You'd do well to remember it, then."

And with that, Natalie snatched her back out of his hand and stormed out of the empty classroom. She later found herself walking aimlessly about the castle, not knowing what to do with her restless mind.


	9. Chapter 9

Natalie waited for the weekend to pass with great annoyance. It seemed to her that the minutes were dragging by excruciatingly slow no matter what she did to try and speed up the time. She had stuck herself in her dorm room through all of Saturday and Sunday, passing what time she could by doing the little homework she had, and reading ahead in her textbooks. She only snuck down to the Great Hall in the early mornings and stocked up enough food in her bag to last her the rest of the day.

See, Natalie had been avoiding Sirius in the best way she knew how. She knew full well that if she were to carry on her weekend how she normally would have, going down to the Great Hall at every meal, studying in the library, maybe even attending the Quidditch match, that Sirius would find her and try to communicate with her. She also knew full well that if he did get a hold of her that she wouldn't be able to simply ignore him or tell him to piss off. No, she would cave in and talk to him, and everything would go back to normal despite the massive argument the two had in the classroom that past Friday.

So she decided to hide herself away for two days, making damned sure that Sirius wouldn't be able to find her. Of course, being the troublemaker that he was, she was certain that he knew exactly where the Ravenclaw common room was located, as he had promised once before. However, she was also sure that there was no way he could figure out the password, and even if he did, there was definitely no way that he could sneak up to her dorm room with no other students noticing. She was safe where she was, at least until classes started again on Monday.

Thankfully, though, she didn't actually have to endure a class with Sirius until Wednesday, so the first two days of the week went by without much hassle from him. He did try to track her down in the Great Hall during her lunch time, but she had seen this coming and made sure to scarf down her lunch in record time and leave just as soon as he was arriving. While he did try to follow her, she escaped him somehow and went on with the rest of her day, disturbance free.

Natalie was dreading Wednesday by the time Tuesday night rolled around. As she was getting settled into her bed, she tried to hatch out a plan for the next day. She would have no choice but to interact with him, as they were in the same class together for over an hour. Even if, by some miraculous happening, she didn't talk to him directly she was sure that his loyal friends would not leave her alone either. They loved Sirius too much to see him suffer, even slightly, by the hands of some girl and would surely do anything to get her to talk to him.

She finally decided that she would indeed have to talk to one of them, but promised herself that she would keep it brief, perhaps making the excuse that it was in the middle of class and that she needed to pay attention to the lesson. It wasn't really an excuse, though. She would never ignore a teacher's lecture just to talk to friends. She was put in Ravenclaw, after all.

By the time Wednesday morning dawned, Natalie was ready for the day that loomed ahead. She gathered her things into her bag, at the same time making sure that her skirt wasn't badly wrinkled and that her stockings were pulled to just the right length, and made her way to the Great Hall. She silently ate her breakfast of toast and jam, taking great care to keep stray crumbs away from her school robes. After she finished she gathered her things once more and, slinging her bag over her shoulder, made her way out of the hall and towards the grounds outside. She vaguely saw Sirius out of the corner of her eye, eating with his friends, but paid him no attention.

Natalie was still furious with him from the Friday before. What he said, what he might have meant, basically everything about their fight, angered her deep down to her soul. To her, he had no right to read the letter or to comment on it. The two of them were neither in a committed nor an exclusive relationship with one another, so it seemed to her that he shouldn't be concerned with how her relationship with Jason was going. It would have been a different story had she not just met him mere months before, but she had, and he felt as though it was his place to say the things he did to her and about her boyfriend.

It was all very confusing at the same time. While she normally would have had no problem spending her time fuming at the very thought of Sirius, something in the back of her mind made it difficult to do so. Every single time he popped up in her head, her immediate anger slowly ebbed away and she ended up just thinking about him; those eyes that she swore could see into her soul, his smile that was so contagious, and the way his soft, dark hair felt in between her fingers as he kissed her…

She angrily shook her head, realizing that she had fallen into the same trance as she had been since the fight. Her head was swimming with thoughts of Sirius, good and bad, as she reached the place where the Care of Magical Creatures class was usually held. Natalie had been so absorbed in her own thoughts that she hadn't noticed that her feet had taken over and moved her to the place she needed to go. She also hadn't noticed that Sirius and his friends were no more than fifty paces behind her the entire time. Once she realized this, she was incredibly glad that they hadn't been in front of her, for if they had turned around even one time to look at her, they would have seen her glazed over eyes and the foolish half grin her lips held as she thought about her several secret rendezvous with Sirius.

Surprisingly, the class went by with no unwanted interruptions from any four of the 'marauders', as Natalie had recently learned their group nickname. She was able to fully concentrate on the lesson, taking extensive notes and even starting on the three parchment roll essay the class had to write about the incredibly boring life of a flobberworm.

When class was over she took all of her loose papers messily in one arm and headed to a secluded tree near the lake to finish the essay, her mind already filled with things to write that she didn't want to forget by the time she got up to her room. She had often sat under the shade of this tree over her past few years at Hogwarts, first discovering its existence during her third year. It provided her with relief from the head during the warm months of the year but also with an escape from the falling snow if she so wished to sit under its branches during the cold months as well. She sat in the same spot, having spent many hours during her first time under the tree sitting in all different places and in all different positions until she found her perfect fit, right up against the trunk and in between a break in the tree's giant roots.

She found herself out in the same place the next day, right after enduring a rather boring Charms lesson for what seemed like the entire afternoon. It was slowly starting to get darker outside, the sun lazily drifting behind cloud after cloud making its way to the horizon. She had changed into warm Muggle clothes after her class was over, grabbing a quick bite to eat in the Great Hall before going out to the tree by the lake to start on some of that week's homework.

The weather had already started getting colder over the past few weeks, but as Natalie walked across the grounds she noticed the leaves had started falling. The crunching under her feet made her feel a bit colder, thinking about how snow would come soon, and she pulled down the sleeves of her gray sweater over her fingers. She felt the cool breeze penetrate the fabric of her jeans as she made her way to the tree.

When she got there, however, someone was already sitting in her spot. Immediately annoyed, for she would obviously have to make her way back up to the castle since it would be far too awkward for two people to sit under the same tree even if she sat on the other side, she moved towards the person to get a better look at who they were.

Sirius looked up automatically, somehow knowing exactly where Natalie would be, and finding her eyes within seconds. She was surprised to see him, so much so that she found herself planted to the spot she was standing in, unable to move an inch.

"How did you know I'd come here?" she asked, not being able to think of anything else to say.

"Come on, it's me you're talking about," Sirius said with his signature smirk.

When Natalie didn't crack a smile at his comment, his smirk fell and was replaced with a look of hesitation and even a little nervousness. "I saw you come out here yesterday," he said, trying again. "I figured I'd try to talk to you out here. It's a bit more secluded than the castle."

Again, Natalie said nothing. Sirius didn't give up, nor did she think he would. Instead, he patted the slowly dying grass next to him, silently asking for her to sit. She did, feeling for some reason that she should listen to him. Perhaps she thought she owed that much to him, though she didn't know why.

"I'm sorry," he said, apologizing right away, not wanting to prolong the conversation any longer. "I know I broke some kind of unspoken rule when I said what I did. I knew I shouldn't have said anything, not even looked at the letter, but…"

His sentence trailed off and Natalie didn't press him to go on. She knew what he wanted to say, yet she didn't actually want to hear the words come out of his mouth. He was the one who said they could be together whilst keeping it a secret, and that's how she wanted to keep things. She loved being around Sirius; he made her laugh and smile and she was always happy when she was with him. Well, almost always. But at the same time, Jason had been a part of her life for years, and she didn't know if she wanted that relationship to end quite yet.

Sirius continued on when Natalie, again, said nothing. "Can we just go back to normal?" he asked her. "Please?"

It was then that Natalie finally acted as though she had heard him. She turned to look at him, her eyes searching his for something, though she didn't know what. "You still want to?" she asked, confused as to why he would.

"Of course," he said quietly.

"Why?" she asked, suddenly needing to know why, after he had surely realized how strongly he felt for her, he would still agree to see her in secrecy.

He thought for a long moment, and she knew he was thinking the same thing as she was. When he finally responded, he looked her straight in the eyes and said, "Because it's better than nothing."


	10. Chapter 10

In the next week after Natalie and Sirius made up, their lives were good and as normal as possible. During the week, Natalie went to all of her classes, did homework and studied. As usual, she spent most of her time in the library or her dorm, making charts of the star's movements or writing an essay on the new defensive spell that she had learned in that week's class. On occasion, Sirius would leave her a note in her bag or one of her pockets (of course, she hadn't noticed him planting it) asking her to meet him by the kitchens or one of the secret passageways that she was getting to know well, though not as well as he and his friends.

However, their most exciting escapades took place over the weekend, where all freedom was theirs to do whatever they wished. Before their fight, they would sneak into the caretaker's office to retrieve items that he had taken from the Marauders, along with other people's things if they were interesting enough. Other times, they would silently make their way into the Great Hall to plant dung bombs underneath the Slytherin table so it would smell terribly when they went to eat their breakfasts in the morning. And every now and then they would simply sit atop the astronomy tower and laugh at each other's stories for hours on end.

No matter what they were doing or who they were with, though, Sirius would always find a way to get Natalie all to himself. She never expected this, as she knew that Sirius was exceptionally close to his friends, and wouldn't let herself sneak between them. The last thing she wanted was for James, Remus or even Peter to hate her for constantly stealing Sirius away from them. She got her time with Sirius almost daily, he made sure of it, and wouldn't say a thing if she didn't.

Natalie was used to Jason, of course, who would only come visit her once, maybe twice, a week. Even then, he would only chat with her for a few hours before giving her one, admittedly, awkward kiss on the lips and one on her cheek and leaving, usually not to be heard of until his next visit. Jason was predictable; he was never one for spontaneity or anything out of the ordinary. Every move he made was calculated down to the very second he would perform it, and needless to say, things with him would get rather boring.

Sirius was nothing of that sort. Compared to Jason, Sirius was a breath of fresh air for Natalie, and she made sure she didn't take a moment of his presence in her life for granted. But the more she thought of Sirius, the more she started feeling guilty about being with two men at the same time.

Since her secret relationship with Sirius started, Natalie was in full acknowledgement that she was in the wrong. It was terrible of her to lead Jason on while leading Sirius on at the same time, and she knew that. As of late, it had started eating away at her. Thoughts of Jason and Sirius would haunt her mind in the most inconvenient of times; during lessons, while she was trying to study, while she was with Sirius.

In no time, Natalie started thinking that she might want to change things with her boyfriends. Of course, she wasn't fully conscious of that fact until it finally hit her, and when it did she couldn't have been more confused. She couldn't stop thinking about it; why did she suddenly want things to change? They had been working out alright so far. Yes, it was a bit hard keeping things with her and Sirius a secret from the entirety of Hogwarts, but they were making it work and they were enjoying themselves as well.

Though the thoughts plagued her mind at almost every waking moment, she pushed them away, sure that she was thinking too much of it. Plus, there was no way that Natalie would let her studies slide just because of a couple of boys.

Weekends were definitely something Natalie, along with the rest of Hogwarts, looked forward to, and on a Thursday afternoon it was almost there. With only two more meals and one more class to go, all the students were getting a little restless. There was, of course, going to be a Hogsmead visit along with a Quidditch match and the majority of Hogwarts' population was excited for one or the other. Natalie and Sirius were planning on going to both events, along with the rest of the Marauders.

Natalie left her Charms lesson early in the afternoon and joined her fellow Ravenclaws to a lunch of roasted chicken and potatoes, making polite conversation when it was expected of her. However, she was hurrying slightly, as she was supposed to meet Sirius in their usual broom closet in only a half hour. Remembering this, she finished her food and rushed past student after student until she finally reached the long stretch of abandoned hallway leading to the closet.

As soon as she could touch the door she had peeked her head inside to see if Sirius was already waiting for her. He was, and as soon as he saw her, he had Natalie in his arms and was shutting and locking the door behind her.

After his greeting, which lasted a bit longer than a normal one, the two of them lit their wands and asked each other about their day. As usual, Natalie's was normal and ordinary. That was just how she liked it. Sirius' was quite the opposite. As he and his friends were all in the same house, and even though they didn't have to, they took all the same classes together. With that said, they got in all the same trouble together. For instance, during that Thursday's class, Sirius and James managed to anger the professor so much that he kicked not only the two troublemakers out of the lesson, but Remus and Peter as well. The latter two were doing nothing wrong; they were actually paying close attention to the class. However, the professor knew of the Marauders and was unsure of what Remus and Peter might do without Sirius and James with them, so he decided to save himself the headache and rid his class of them simply as a precaution.

From Sirius' story of the day, he went into talking about his friends as a whole, something he did quite often. He would start with how they were so fun to be around, how they were always doing something, but they would start talking about things with a deeper meaning. He would talk about things such as how they were all like brothers to him, and how he would do anything to keep them safe and happy.

That conversation then led into how his friends, James specifically, ha saved him from his family. He let Natalie know that his family had always been involved in darker magic, and how he suspected them of being part of this new wave of dark wizards rebelling against the ministry and Muggles. He told her of how they had tried to get him to join their 'movements', and how he had blatantly refused, and how he had tried to save his brother from his parent's influence. As Natalie had briefly met Sirius' brother, and with the impression he left her, it was really no surprise that Regulus had gone down the path that his parents followed.

At this point, Sirius asked about Natalie's parents for the first time. She told him about her mother, how she worked in a factory picking up any hours that she could to be able to pay for their small house, and how she was an only child.

"What about your father?" he asked, having been listening intently and noticing that Natalie had neglected to mention a father.

She hadn't mentioned him on purpose, though. He hadn't been in her life for many years, and that was just the way she wanted things to be. Her father was a bad man, in her eyes just as bad as Sirius' parents put together. She knew that she could trust Sirius with anything, not that this information was a secret to be kept, but it certainly wasn't anything she would tell someone in passing.

Clenching her jaw, she finally answered him, saying, "In a perfect world I wouldn't have a father."

Natalie saw him become confused, and knew that he would ask more questions. She mentally prepared herself to bare all, almost wanting to tell him at the same time. She wanted him to know everything about her. As expected, Sirius asked why she said that.

She looked him in the eyes. "My father is a terrible man, Sirius."

At this, his eyebrows raised in further confusion, but didn't ask 'why' again, knowing Natalie would continue herself. Instead of just telling him, she decided to show him how bad her father actually was.

Natalie lowered her hand to her skirt, making sure Sirius followed her with his gaze. Once she reached the hem, she started to lift the fabric up her thigh, revealing her skin inch by inch. She went slowly, making sure it didn't become too much for herself to handle, and giving herself enough time to make her hand keep moving. At any other time, Sirius' expression would have made her laugh forever, but at that moment she wasn't sure she could find anything funny. Right before Natalie reached her hips, she stopped. Her slim fingers held the fabric against her skin and she lowered her wand with her other hand down to where both sets of eyes were focused.

She watched Sirius' face intently, as he studied her skin with the same rapt attention. On her upper thigh were several marks about the size of a Knut, all round and a lighter color than her actual skin tone. It was immediately apparent that they were scars, but Sirius didn't know what from. As soon as he realized what they were, though, he felt anger flare up behind his eyes and throughout his entire body. Sirius looked up at her, and saw that she was watching him with an unreadable expression on her face. Moving purely on instinct and curiosity, he reached out his hand, not taking his eyes away from Natalie, making sure that what he was doing was acceptable. When she gave him a slight nod he brought his eyes back down to her leg and began touching the scars.

"He liked cigars," Natalie told him simply, turning her head away from his.

She felt his eyes on her when she said this, and she had the sudden urge to tell him everything about her father, even though it was painful to remember everything.

"That's as much as he ever got to do to me. My mother got it much worse. He was absolutely dreadful to live with."

"What ever happened to him?"

Natalie pursed her lips just thinking about her father, the wretched man. "The Muggle authorities eventually caught onto him. He was a notorious drunk around town and he got into a fight one night at the pub. When they followed him back to our house they saw my mother. She wasn't working at the time so she never left the house. They arrested him and he went to prison."

"When did all this happen?" Sirius asked, visibly relaxed after Natalie told him he was out of the picture.

"A long time ago," she replied, her eyes cast downward, speaking on auto-pilot. She suddenly looked at him when she said, "It's been a very long time since I've thought about my father. I'd like to keep it that way, after tonight. But until then you can ask me anything you want."

He nodded, knowing that this might be the only chance to bring up what he had on his mind, and what he'd been thinking about for days upon days. He started off by asking a simple question, hoping it would lead him to the bigger subject. "Why didn't your mother ever stop him?"

Natalie scoffed, rolling her eyes in the process. "I'd be surprised if my mother stood up to a thief while she watched him rob our home. She's just not the type. She would have much rather let him do whatever he wanted and just clean up the mess afterwards than say something herself."

"Why didn't you say anything?" he asked, quietly, knowing he was already pressing her patience.

Natalie furrowed her eyebrows at this, confused by Sirius' question, yet thinking of the answer anyway. "I was young and, well I…I must have taken after my mother. Afraid of the confrontation, perhaps."

Sirius watched the gears turn in her head. She was so beautiful when she was deep in thought, as she often was. He knew that what he was about to ask Natalie would cause an uproar, one that he wouldn't be able to take back, but he was confident that it would turn out in his favor in the end.

"Do you think that's why," he hesitated, not taking his eyes off of her, "maybe, why you won't leave Jason, despite the way he treats you?"

Her eyes shot up to his, completely taken aback by his prying question. She knew now that he had been thinking along the same lines as she had since their fight. He was uncomfortable with the fact that she had someone else besides him, and now he was trying to figure out why she was with them both.

"He's really not as bad as you think," she whispered, suddenly not able to look at him directly.

"You're lying," Sirius refused to stop looking at her, knowing that she was having an internal battle with herself to either keep calm or get angry and leave. I read the letter, don't forget. He was far too casual with the way he spoke to you. That means he's done it before. A lot before."

All Natalie did was look at him in silent agreement with the accusations he was pinning against her boyfriend. "I'm right," he said, and when she opened her mouth to retort, he quieted her by saying, "I know I am, you don't have to say it."

Sirius took a deep breath, knowing that he had gone too far to turn back now. He had to keep going, keep asking her hard questions and seeing how she felt about everything that he had been pondering. He scooted closer to her, grabbing her hand and interlacing her fingers with his.

"Is it miserable with him?"

She let a small smile escape her, despite feeling as if she was being interrogated. "Anyone could be seen as miserable to be with compared to you. I love being with you."

He smiled as well, as he felt the same with her. That's what triggered this conversation for him. He had never been with one girl this long, or with the kinds of feelings he had for Natalie. Sirius couldn't get enough of her, and he was tired of keeping her a secret from everyone outside of his friends. He wanted her to himself, wanted to show her off, wanted to let everyone know she was his girlfriend.

Sirius' smile slowly faded from his face. He squeezed her hand slightly, getting ready for the hardest thing he'd say all night. Natalie was looking down at her hand in his, concentrating on something deep in her mind.

"Leave him."

For the second time that night, Natalie's eyes shot up to his. This time, though, they were filled with so many different emotions. Confusion, mostly, but also sadness, concern, anger. "What?" she asked, incredulously.

"Leave him. Be with me," he said, looking at her with so much hope.

Natalie's breathing became ragged, her heart starting to race. "Sirius, I am with you. I'm here now, aren't I?"

He placed a finger on one side of her chin and moved it towards him so that she was looking in his eyes. "You know that's not what I mean. I want you to myself, I don't want to share you."

"You wanted this to be a secret," she said harshly, accusing him of breaking the agreement they had.

"I know. But that was months ago, before we really knew each other. I didn't think I'd develop these kinds of feelings for you. And I know you have them for me, too, you can't deny it." Sirius was pleading with her, trying to make her understand that he was better for her than her boyfriend could ever be.

Natalie's head was swimming. No, she couldn't deny her feelings for Sirius. However, he sprung this on her so suddenly; and after sharing so many memories of her father not long before, she found it hard to think straight. She couldn't make a decision under this pressure, she might regret something she would do or say.

"Sirius I…" she stared, "if you'd just give me some time to think..."

Sirius' face immediately fell. Hers was not the reaction he was hoping for. When he played the conversation out before hand, she would have already been in his arms, having agreed right away. But in reality, she wanted to 'think'. He didn't know exactly what that meant, but he did know it could turn against him.

He was angry with her now. He couldn't help it; he didn't want to be angry. He wanted to say, 'take all the time you need,' and 'just think about what I've said,' but instead he found his body lifting itself up, releasing her hand as he got to his feet.

Natalie looked at him in confusion, sad and scared about what was happening with them. It was all going on so fast she didn't know what to do. She couldn't control her body or else she would have gotten up after him.

"Yeah," he agreed, though it was a bit sarcastic. As he opened the door, he turned his head back to her, saying, "Come find me when you've made a decision."

"Sirius, wait," she tried to stop him, but he closed the door behind him, leaving her in the dim glow of her own wand.

Natalie didn't know what had just gone on. Her mind was foggy with an influx of information she had just received from Sirius. She found herself sitting in the same place for what seemed like hours before her head finally cleared. She got up with a purpose, legs weak from sitting for so long, but pushed through and made her way to the Ravenclaw common room and up to her dorm.


	11. Chapter 11

Natalie had always considered pacing an odd thing. Why tire yourself and hurt your feet when you could sit comfortably? She seriously doubted that walking around aimlessly helped people think any better than sitting. Though, as she paced around her dorm in the Ravenclaw tower, she noticed that it did indeed help her think better, as if her physical movement was helping the movement of her thoughts.

Love and relationships and feelings were all very fickle things. This thought danced around Natalie's head as she replayed the sequence of events from the broom closet not thirty minutes earlier. People want you, but only in certain ways and at certain times, but then change their minds at the drop of a hat, as if it was perfectly alright to toy with another's emotion at will.

Sirius had made up his mind that he no longer wanted his and Natalie's relationship to be a secret, and that he wanted her all to himself. She couldn't blame him, really. She had the same feelings about him as he did towards her but for some reason she wasn't able to bring herself to completely go along with what he wanted.

As if she was participating in a lecture class, Natalie made a mental pro's and con's list. Jason, for instance, had been in her life for years. He was familiar, he was normal. Yet, at the same time, he was plain, he was boring, he was rude, selfish, extremely controlling and overbearing.

Sirius was the complete opposite in every regard. He was new and knew next to nothing about Natalie. He was anything but normal, loved the idea of getting into trouble, had problems with authoritative figures, and didn't really care about school work. But he was so much fun and sweet and caring and just the way he looked at Natalie all the time, whether he knew she was watching or not, made her absolutely melt.

So why was this so difficult? As much as she wanted to deny it, wanting herself to be faithful to the person that she knew everyone else expected her to be with and wanting to be the good, normal girl, she knew that she had fallen completely for the shaggy, dark haired, troublesome, amazing boy that had given all of himself to her that night.

"I am such a fool," Natalie said to herself. Not only was she feeling idiotic for wasting such time realizing that she felt so strongly for Sirius, but she had hurt him tenfold in the process.

Scurrying to her desk, Natalie grabbed a spare piece of parchment and dipped a stray quill in an emptying jar of ink. She scribbled out a few lines hastily, not caring in the least bit of how Jason would judge her on her tidiness before he even ready any of the words.

_Jason,_

_ Terribly sorry I haven't been able to get back to you sooner. I regret to inform you_

_that what my mother told you was very true, I have been seeing someone else._

_Unfortunately, I am going to have to end our relationship in the utmost urgency._

_ Sorry again,_

_ Natalie_

Taking the parchment and a note to her mother to please deliver the message to Jason, Natalie threw on a cardigan as she pounded down the stairs towards the exit of the Ravenclaw common room. Throwing the door open she ran as fast as she could to the top of the owlry tower. It took her only about five minutes to reach the top of the tower, and though she was out of breath and dying to grab a stitch in her side, she wrapped the letter around the first owl she saw and sent it on its way.

Without a moment hesitation, she turned on her heel and ran, dodging through hallways and skipping several steps at a time down the stair cases, being careful to avoid the moving ones, until she reached the Great Hall. There was a small crowd of people leaving, signifying that the late dinner rush was just ending. Natalie pushed her way through the crowd, heaving large breaths of air into her lungs to try and calm the panting. When she saw Sirius and the rest of the Marauders she hurried over to them as fast as her legs could go.

"Sirius!" she panted, brushing the hair out of her face as she finally reached him.

Sirius glanced back at the three boys behind him, silently telling them to stay just out of ear shot. They, of course, didn't, but did back up to give the couple their space.

"I thought about what you said," Natalie told him, lowering her voice after catching her breath.

"Oh yeah? How'd that go for you?" Sirius asked sarcastically, barely making eye contact before brushing past her towards the door.

Natalie furrowed her brow in confusion, but continued with her thoughts "Well, I just needed a bit of time for myself to make up my mind-"

"Make up your mind?" Sirius asked, turning around and facing her finally. "You shouldn't have had to make up your mind about anything."

"It was a big decision, Sirius," Natalie said, a note of pleading in her voice. Why was he acting so strange?

"Yeah, well you should have a lot of time to make all the decisions you need to from now on," Sirius said, starting to walk to opposite way again. "We're over."

Natalie's heart sank into her stomach. How could he say that if he was the one who made her decide between him and Jason? No, he didn't mean it. As soon as she told him that she broke up with Jason he'd take back what he said. She started to follow after him, saying, "Sirius, wait."

He turned around again and looked at her directly in her beautiful blue eyes. "Don't bother, he said, and left the Great Hall.

Natalie couldn't say anything. Her voice didn't seem to be working no matter how hard she tried. She turned around and looked at James, Remus and Peter, all of whom were staring at her in surprised confusion. What just happened?


	12. Chapter 12

Breakups are hard, especially to teenagers, who end up feeling like their lives are over. But no one, not even adults, can deny that they're hard. All that time spent with another person suddenly means nothing and is expected to be forgotten. It doesn't matter who ended the relationship, or if the other person didn't want it to end. One person is almost always left upset and brokenhearted.

Natalie was feeling those exact feelings still a week after Sirius decided to end their secret relationship. She suddenly found herself walking the halls of the castle alone where she used to walk them hand in hand with Sirius. She ate alone, she studied alone, and she sat in class alone. She hadn't been dumped by the rest of the Marauders, but Sirius had certainly made it clear that Natalie was officially shunned from the group.

All of those things aside, the one thing Natalie noticed most was how much she missed the little things. She was constantly thinking about his soft curly locks of dark hair, his soft but slightly calloused hands, his warm lips on hers…

Natalie shook her head to shoo the thoughts from her lonely brain. Looking down in front of her she saw that she hadn't taken down a single note during Charms. She had just scribbled, barely legible, the steps to the new spell to be learned for the next week when the old and tired professor dismissed the class. Natalie was pushing her messy roll of parchment into her shoulder bag, still distracted by the thoughts of Sirius diminishing in her head when she noticed someone come up behind her. As she turned around she stopped in surprise upon seeing two boys, one with sandy colored hair and pale skin and the other with messy jet black hair and glasses perched delicately on the bridge of his nose.

"Oh, hello," she said awkwardly, lifting her bag up onto her shoulder.

"Hello," Remus greeted cheerfully though his eyes were tired.

"Care to have lunch with us?" James asked, gesturing toward the classroom door.

Natalie hesitated. She knew that Sirius was angry with her and she did not want to give him an excuse to absolutely loath her. Besides, she didn't want to get James and Remus into any trouble with their friend, either.

The boys couldn't help but notice how the girl hesitated at the offer. Remus told her that it was okay, and maybe another time. James said, "Yeah, another time. Although, if you're nervous about what Sirius might think, you should know that we don't care. You're our friend, Nat, not just Padfoot's ex-girl."

What a simple thing to say, but it held so much meaning. She was their friend and they had become quite close over the past few months. James used the Marauder's nickname for her and proved that he knew her well enough to point out what she was thinking in her own head. And Natalie knew the two boys well enough to realize that they would not leave her alone until she started to be comfortable around them again.

"Alright, sure. I could go grab something to eat."

The boys grinned and the three made their way down to the Great Hall. They talked as if nothing at all had happened between her and Sirius. She was thankful for that; it took her mind off of how sad she had been over the last week. It gave her hope, also, that even if she and Sirius were no longer together that she might still be able to keep her friends and that part of her new life that she so adored.

She and the boys enjoyed their lunch together and the breath of relief from stress they all sighed. They ate their boiled potatoes and meats, laughed and shared stories of the last week. Hers were boring, though she left out the sad and miserable details; theirs were exciting, though they did their best to leave out all details of Sirius. Her feelings were mixed; she wanted to hear what he was up to and if he was secretly as sad as she was, but she also didn't want any other excuses to think about him.

Walking out of the Great Hall, Remus left to go study in the library, leaving Natalie and James to talk alone. The awkward silence didn't last long, not to Natalie's surprise as James seldom kept his thoughts to himself. He and Sirius were almost identical in that respect.

"So," he started saying, trying to gain all of Natalie's attention. How are you, really?"

"I've told you, I'm fine," she answered instantly, rolling her eyes.

"Liar."

Natalie looked at him seriously for just a moment, making a swift decision on whether or not she really wanted to share her feelings with him. She didn't but…

"I'm sad," she told him, feeling and sounding childish but being honest nonetheless.

His eyes went from sarcastic to soft and understanding in an instant. He looked at her curiously before saying, without caution for he knew they were good enough friends, "Why, though?"

"What do you mean, 'why'?" she retorted, taking offense.

"Well, I mean…well you chose the other guy, didn't you? You knew Sirius didn't want to keep you two a secret anymore."

Before she could stop herself, before she could remind herself that her own thoughts should probably not be publicized, she blurted out one word: "No!"

She had clapped her hand to her forehead before James had even mustered up the look of confusion he held on his face.

"No?" he repeated, trying to work out the mystery quickly in his brain. "Wait…you didn't?"

One person finding out her secret was one too many. Natalie grabbed James by the shoulder of his robes and dragged him to a quiet corner of the castle, not far from her own Ravenclaw common room.

James wasted no time. "You didn't choose the other guy?" he asked, really trying to hide his excitement and keep his voice low.

Natalie let out a sigh. "No, I broke up with him."

James' face lit up. "You have to tell Sirius! He'll be thrilled. I know right where he is, come on-"

Natalie pulled her hand out of James', who was trying to pull her back towards the entrance of the castle. "No, James."

He looked even more confused. "But why? You can both go back to normal now."

"James, I broke up with Jason a week ago," Natalie said, preparing to wait a moment for her friend to understand what she was saying.

Just as she thought, it took James several moment. When it dawned on him, he looked up at Natalie with a saddened look in his eyes and on his face. "You did it the night he broke up with you?"

She simply shrugged her shoulders, trying to act as if it wasn't a big deal. She knew she could be honest with James but for some reason, perhaps to protect herself from anymore unnecessary upset, she tried her hardest to disguise her heartache. "It's over now. I don't want to dwell on it."

After trying meekly to console her, James left Natalie to her lonesome, just as she was used to as of late. He wanted to perhaps take a walk around the castle with her, maybe talk about things, but she assured him that she was fine and that she actually needed time to study. That was true, Natalie had three rolls of parchment due in a week on the latest spell learned in Charms that she needed to attempt to make a dent in, not to mention the endless pile of star charts that she was constantly trying to catch up on, no matter how much she actually got done with in one night.

It seemed, though, that everyone else in the castle had the same great idea also. She couldn't seem to find Remus, or any other empty seat for that matter. The library was much too overcrowded, and no matter how hard the tiny woman of a librarian tried to hush the crowd of students, the murmurs and mumblings had overtaken her and turned into a low rumbling that could be heard even beyond the thick wooden doors.

Frustrated after searching the castle in every place she knew, from empty classrooms to supposedly deserted hallways to a desperate last attempt in the kitchens, Natalie bundled herself in several shirts and her only wool sweater and grabbed a few textbooks, rolls of parchment, ink and quill and hustled outside and to the edge of the Black Lake where her favorite tree was located.

Thanks to the weather becoming more and more chilled as the days went on, the tree had lost most of its leaves, the brown and orange foliage making crunching noises underneath Natalie's feet. Some people might have thought the landscape was dark and frightening, with the bare branches of the trees stark and black against the clear night sky, the moon full in the distance. On the contrary, Natalie found it extremely relaxing, leaning her back against the tree's trunk and sliding her body down onto the hard ground underneath. She was facing the lake, the bright moon reflecting off of its surface to give her just enough light to see her surroundings.

Natalie took out her wand and lit the tip so that she could read her book and her writing on the parchment. With the wand in her left hand pointing toward her line of sight, she started to read, take notes, and write lines of intelligent words that eventually turned into paragraphs which eventually turned into entire pages. She started to mute the sounds of nature when her concentration became more intense. All that she saw were the writing on the paper of the book and her own handwriting flowing out from the tip of the quill. Her mind more at ease now, the words started coming to her quicker without her having to take nearly as many breaks-

Natalie jumped so violently that the book and parchment that had been resting comfortably on either one of her knees crashed to the ground with a loud clap as the book closed shut. She whipped her head around to where the forest was, almost subconsciously dropping the quill and switching her wand from her left hand to her dominant right hand. She stared into the dark forest, hardly moving from fear and adrenaline except for the slight rise and fall of her chest as she tried to steady her breathing.

She didn't know if there was actually anything to fear but she tried hard to remember her spells from Defense Against the Dark Arts just as a precaution. She could have sworn she heard howling…

"Mate…"

The hesitation in James' voice made Sirius look up. Seeing the look on his friend's face told him that there was something wrong. Pulling on his cloak, he stood up and walked to where the dark haired boy was standing.

"What? We already knew it was a full moon tonight, you scared?" he said, making sure his sarcasm was evident.

"Not that, you git. _That._"

James was pointing to a tree by the Black Lake, the one he had waited under not a few weeks ago to try to talk to Natalie. Sirius squinted, hoping the action would improve his regular humanly eyesight. He saw someone standing to the left of the tree, wand held tight at their side, a wave of blonde hair reflected from the moonlight.

"Is that…"

"Natalie," James finished, his voice grave and his face worried.

"Why the hell is she outside?" Sirius asked no one in particular, his voice rising.

"Don't yell," James reminded, gesturing to a door on the second floor of the building they were taking shelter in.

"He's taken the potion," Sirius said.

"Any little thing could set him off, you know that," James said in a scolding, yet hushed, voice.

"She must have figured out what we're doing here." Sirius started toward the door, pulling the handle loudly without thinking. "We have to get her back inside."

"Padfoot!" James whispered hurriedly.

Both boys stopped dead in their tracks. They heard a deep growling from the room upstairs, right before the door swung open, ripping one of the hinges off the wall and launching the creature behind it down the stairs and out the open door.

Natalie had just begun to gather up her things when she heard the loud bang. Dropping her possessions again, her wand still tight in her hand, she turned again. This time, however, she knew she wasn't imagining things. She was, in fact, one hundred percent certain that she was not imagining the giant creature bounding toward her at an incredible speed.

She had always heard about the amazing intuition that human beings had about them. Flight or fight was purely instinctual, and though she was waiting anything but patiently, her mind and body seemed to be frozen, unable to process what was surely going to be an imminent death.

Thankfully, her body seemed to become aware of the situation with just enough time to throw herself to the ground, avoiding a painful collision with the massive thing that had launched itself into the air just at that moment.

Her wand was no longer in her hand. Where had it gone? Natalie was frantic, scraping her fingers across the earth around her trying to feel for the thin piece of wood. She gave up when she heard the thing behind her grunt. Turning slowly, hoping that its eyesight was terrible and wouldn't see her if she didn't make any sudden movements, she finally got a good look at her attacker.

No, it would have incredible eyesight. And a seriously good sense of smell, at that. The werewolf knew exactly where she was and it was making unwavering eye contact. Natalie swallowed, her throat as dry as the leaves she had walked on just a short time before. The werewolf started making a low growling noise in the back of its throat.

Wait. Natalie turned around, her back toward the wolf. She was wrong, the werewolf wasn't the one growling. The fact might have made her feel a bit more comforted except for the fact that the growling belonged to something else. A large, muscular black dog was standing in front of her now, its eyes shifting from her to the wolf behind her. It was the one making the growling noise, though she couldn't be sure who it was directed to. Perhaps it and the werewolf were friends?

She didn't have much time to consider the possibilities of this thought as the werewolf launched itself over Natalie and against the dog, hitting the back of her head with one of its paws in the process. The force of the blow knocked her onto her face, her hands blocking some of the shock. The sharp sting of pain told her that her hands had been injured, though not badly enough that she couldn't use them to push herself back up and onto her feet.

The world spun. She was dizzy and used the tree beside her to lean against when her feet wouldn't move forward. Natalie closed her eyes and touched her hand to her left temple, using her fingers to put just a bit of pressure, hoping that it would ease the headache threatening to unfold.

When she opened her eyes, the black dog was nowhere in sight, though the werewolf was suddenly focused on Natalie again. Her body stiffened, in full and complete knowledge that she was without a wand and was not skilled in the art of Muggle fighting. The wolf started to make its way toward her, slowly, teasing her with the pain that it was about to make her feel. She saw it stop and lean back on its haunches, preparing its body to pounce on her and begin its mauling…

But that never happened. She saw movement out of the corner of her eye, and moved her head to the left just in time to see the black dog reappear, with a large deer with even larger antlers not far behind it.

The scene seemed to be going in slow motion. The dog was in midair as she turned her head, and she saw the surprise in its eyes as its paws made contact with the side of her face. It was clear that the dog had not intended to hit her there, but it didn't matter. She felt her flesh sting and break under its sharp claws, felt the dog try to pull back but not quick enough. She fell to the ground, the dog on top of her and for the first time got a good look at the creature. Though she felt the blood from her own body start to flow down her neck, and though she began to feel her breathing labor, she couldn't stop looking into the eyes of the dog. Where had she seen them before?

The dog's gray eyes were the last thought that Natalie had before the world left her and she was thrown into a land of darkness. Her pain ebbed away, to her satisfaction, and she let her body go limp.


	13. Chapter 13

The world was hazy and full of a misty gray fog that was both unsettling and comforting in the same moment. At times, it was so thick that nothing could be seen but the gray swirling and unfurling around Natalie. Other times, though, when she tried extremely hard, the mist would thin and she could make out life beyond her confusing realm.

There was a noise that sounded like crying. Natalie couldn't tell who was next to her, nor who was comforting the crying person.

"It'll be alright…she'll wake up…"

More fog. Who will wake up? Were the strange people beyond her reach talking about her? Certainly they were…but in that case, what was so wrong with her that they were that worried?

These short clearings of Natalie's mind were few and far between. It seemed like ages before she was able to see past the fog for more than a few seconds. When those seconds turned into minutes, she realized that she might be past the misty world that she had lived in for so long. She blinked and opened her eyes fully, taking in her surroundings.

The hospital wing, obviously. She was lying in an obsessively clean and white linen-ed bed placed in an extremely large and wide open area of the castle. Windows that were the length of the floor to the ceiling lined the walls, but the light streaming from them was currently muted by long curtains.

Natalie went to lift her head up but a series of sharp pains through her body made her lie back on her bed. Her head was throbbing uncontrollably, the left side of her face and shoulder were stinging as if they were on fire, and her limbs were sore from the overuse of her muscles.

Slightly out of breath from the shock of her newly found injuries, she waited a moment to gather her strength and tried to sit up again. The second attempt was not much more successful than the first, except for the fact that she made an involuntary squealing noise from the pain and effort of trying to do something so simple.

"What are you doing?"

Natalie tried to look to her right to see who was speaking to her, but the blinding headache that had now overtaken her brain made it so movement of her head was near impossible.

A face appeared over hers. Seeing the sandy hair falling over the tired and worried eyes of the pale boy in front of her was like being able to take a breath of fresh air after being underwater for far too long.

"Remus," she croaked, her vocal cords having been out of use for so long.

"You mustn't exert yourself, Natalie, you're far too injured," he said, pushing her shoulders back onto the bed under her with a caring force.

"I noticed," she said quietly.

He looked at her steadily and she noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

"You look sick," she noted.

"As do you," he mocked. "Don't worry about me."

"You're my friend, I'll worry about you if I please."

Remus' gaze hesitated and then broke away from hers. He placed his head in his hands and heaved a deep sigh.

"What's wrong?" Natalie asked, concerned and confused about why he seemed so distraught. Surely her accident wasn't the cause of him acting in such a way?

It took him a moment to answer her, but when he did his voice was muffled and sad.

"I'm sorry, Nat," he said into his hands.

Her brows furrowed, she asked, "What for? I'm alright now, just a bit sore. It wasn't your fault, what happened. Just a freak accident."

Remus' head shot up from his hands, his eyes finding hers immediately. It was as if he was trying to search her brain for something; he was staring at her for so long it started to make her a bit uncomfortable.

After a long moment, he spoke first. "You have no idea, do you?"

"No idea of what?" Natalie asked, now becoming exasperated.

He got up from the chair next to her bed abruptly, his mouth open slightly in what Natalie could only imagine was shock, though she didn't know what from.

"I'll be right back," he said shortly. "You stay here."

"Where else could I go?" she shouted after him as he stormed from the Hospital Wing

Remus started running after descending the first staircase that lead down to the Great Hall. When he reached the Entrance Hall he could hear the low rumble of many students gathered in one place and followed the noise until he reached the opening into the Great Hall where the majority of the students in the castle were enjoying a late lunch on the last day of their weekend.

He didn't stop running until he reached the far end of the Gryffindor table where he found his three friends sitting together picking at nearly full plates of food, barely talking to one another. James had been to visit Natalie nearly as many times as Remus had over the last few days. She had been unconscious for the majority of the time, though they knew she had moments of clarity here and there. Peter had been to see her once or twice, though the two weren't great friends which meant his visit was mostly spent standing a few feet away while James visited. Sirius hadn't visited her once.

Remus stopped where his friends were, but did not sit down with them. They looked up once they heard the labored breathing of someone who just ran a great length of castle and made curious gazes at their friend.

"She's awake," Remus panted, pushing his slightly overgrown hair out of his eyes.

James stood up, pushing his plate away from him as he did. "How is she?"

Sirius made a motion that looked as if he was about to stand, but was obviously having some sort of internal struggle with himself, and stayed sitting. However, he looked at Remus intently, willing him to give some sort of information about Natalie.

Remus looked at the two of them and sighed, not knowing how to handle the current situation at all. "She doesn't know it was us," he said simply.

Sirius stood up at his words, and it was he that spoke first, to Remus and James' surprise. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, she has no idea that it was the four of us that night. She has no idea that it was," Remus lowered his voice and turned his head to make sure no one was eavesdropping, "me that attacked her."

"How does she not know? That's the only reason she would have been down on the grounds that night, wouldn't it? If she figured everything out and wanted to see for herself?" James asked.

"Apparently we thought wrong," Remus said running a hand down his face, feeling the exhaustion hit him once more, as it had many times over the past few days.

"We've got to go talk to her about this, right now," James finalized, starting to move towards the doors to the Entrance Hall.

James and Remus stopped and turned around when they didn't hear Sirius' footsteps behind them.

"Padfoot come on," Remus tempted.

Sirius stayed silent and unmoving, having another silent struggle with himself.

James was fed up. "Sirius," he started, making his friend pay close attention as he never used his actual name. "You haven't been to see her at all since it happened. I know you're caught up between feeling guilty and hating her or whatever's going on in your daft head, but suck it up because she's sitting up there feeling confused and we need to help her through this."

James' eyes bore into Sirius'. A quick moment passed between the friends before Sirius started to walk up the Gryffindor table beside them, through the Entrance Hall and up towards the Hospital Wing.

Natalie had sat in her temporary bed with her arms by her side, hardly moving, for what seemed like hours before she heard the large doors of the wing open again. Moving her head slowly, learning from her past mistakes, she saw Remus, James, and to her slight surprise Sirius walking toward her bed.

"What did you go and get them for?" she directed her question toward Remus.

"Nat, we've got to talk to you about what happened," James said gently, pulling up extra chairs for him and Sirius.

The three boys sat around her bed and she looked at them curiously. "What do you remember, exactly?" James asked.

Natalie hesitated, knowing the story would sound incredibly fake. She felt a hint embarrassed to have to relay the story in front of Sirius, for he was surely still angry with her and would think she was being ridiculous. He wouldn't meet her eyes.

"I was studying under the tree-" she started, but Remus cut her off.

"Why were you studying outside so late at night?"

"There were no quiet spots inside the castle," she said, a note of defiance in her voice. "It was fine for a while, but that's when…"

Should she lie? No, what kind of lie would she be able to come up with on the spot that wouldn't sound as crazed as the truth? Besides, she'd hesitated for so long now that the boys would have no trouble telling she was faking. So, with no other options but thoroughly embarrassing herself, she told the truth.

"The rumors about werewolves living in the forest must be true, because I saw one that night. It's not what attacked me, that was a giant black dog, but still. And I never knew werewolves had animal friends, either. There was a deer there, too. It was all very odd, really."

The rambling made Natalie feel a bit better, as if she had gotten something irksome off her chest. She heaved a sigh of relief until she saw the three faces staring back at her.

"Well, I know it sounds asinine but it is the truth," she said stubbornly.

"It was a stag, actually," James said.

Natalie thought he was being funny until she remembered that he hadn't been there. "How would you know, have you seen them before?" she asked with pure curiosity.

"Nat," James said, looking her directly in the eyes, "we _are_ them."

Silence so absolute that one could her students fumbling floors beneath them filled the room. We are them? They were who? They couldn't possibly be saying that they were…no, it couldn't be…

"What?" was all that she could muster between the sudden influxes of her thoughts.

James sighed. "I'm the stag you saw. Sirius is the dog. And…" he hesitated.

"Remus is the werewolf," Natalie finished his sentence for him.

The room was silent once more. Her brain couldn't seem to keep up with the train of thought speeding around behind her eyes. No wonder he always looked so sick, especially, she now realized, around the time of the full moon.

Remus interrupted her internal ramblings. With a hand extended out over hers, he said, for the second time that day, "I'm so sorry, Natalie."

And again, for the second time, Natalie asked, "What for?"

He stared at her, dumbfounded, as if she had just said something extremely unintelligent. "What do you mean 'what for'? We've just explained to you what really happened, that's what for."

"That's great and all, but you're not the one who hurt me, are you? You didn't do anything but chase me around and give me a bit of a scare." Natalie was, of course, angry at no one in the situation, as she believed it was truly a freak accident, even after learning everything about her friends. Nevertheless, her comment placed a large elephant right in the center of the room, as all four of them were perfectly well aware of who did hurt her.

The boys left shortly afterwards with promises from James and Remus to return the following day. This meant that Natalie was left to herself for her first night of being conscious since the attack. Hardly tired from having slept through several days, she entertained herself by memorizing the new scars that had taken residence on her body. She didn't mind them, really. Insane though it may have sounded, she found them anything but ugly. On the contrary, once she got past the pain of the still open wounds covered in essence of murtlap, she found them quite interesting. True, she hadn't really taken a look at them, but she could feel them. They took her fingertips on a rollercoaster ride; they started at her jawline, four lines that curved down her neck, just missing any major veins, and then four tapered down to three as the dog realized what was happening and tried to pull away, its claws leaving deep lines following the length of her collarbone and shoulder.

The sounds of the Hospital Wing doors clicking open snapped Natalie back into reality. Her eyes flicked to her right just in time to see a head of dark curly hair highlighted by the soft rays of moonlight sneaking through the now loosely curtained windows. She allowed her eyes to follow the man's path all the way to her bedside, and then to make contact with his, gray and always full of emotion.

The silence between Natalie and Sirius was deafening. After a few moments she could no longer take the awkwardness and spoke first.

"Why are you here?"

He hesitated at her abruptness. "I wanted to make sure you're okay," Sirius said lamely.

Willing herself not to roll her eyes, Natalie replied, "I told everyone earlier that I was. You were there, you heard."

"Yeah I also heard everything else you said.

She knew this was about blaming him over Remus. She was opening her mouth to explain to him that she was not mad when he cut her off and said, "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know you didn't, I felt you try to pull away."

Sirius looked at her plainly. "I would never try to hurt you."

Natalie knew he was willing her to understand the full weight of his words. She did, knew that he meant that he never intended to end their relationship the way he did, perhaps that he meant he never wanted to leave her at all. She knew all of this, yet could not bring herself to tell him the truth about anything; not about the fact that she left Jason for him, or that she still had feelings for him, or that she so longed to reach out and stroke his dark, soft hair.

She thought for a moment that she had spoken that last bit aloud, for Sirius had suddenly leaned in closer to her. Natalie smelled him before she felt him; that scent of something woody she now recognized as being from his frequent runs into the forest; that scent that always reminded her of mischief but gave her comfort all in the same breath. As she filled her lungs, his lips met hers and she left the Hospital Wing for a land much more exciting. This was a land where the only two inhabitants were she and Sirius, one where she felt alive and exhilarated and jubilant and calm all at once.

And then she landed, her lips warm and her skin tingling, back in the castle. She opened her eyes and was not surprised to see Sirius' back toward her, walking brusquely toward the doors.

""This doesn't change anything, does it?" Natalie asked, not bothering to hide the slight hoarseness that had entered her throat. After all, it wasn't the first time he had heard her like that.

He stopped but did not turn to face her. She saw his shoulders rise and fall in a sigh before he replied, quietly, as if he didn't really want her to hear, "No."


	14. Chapter 14

Natalie was released from the Hospital Wing only a few days before the Christmas holiday was set to start. Her teachers had been given slightly vague details of her sick leave from the headmaster, and they were all very sympathetic and understanding. With a promise from all of them that she would be able to finish the work she missed over the holiday, she allowed herself to relax and recover in the castle before the holiday started instead of driving herself crazy trying to work on the load of homework she had waiting for her.

The snow had started finally, as the students had been expecting it for days before it made its appearance on the Friday afternoon before half of the castle went back to their homes to enjoy the holidays with their families. Natalie was sitting in the Great Hall, a plate full of delicious steak and bread in front of her, accompanied by a steaming hot bowl of creamy chicken soup, set in front of her. As she dipped a piece of crispy bread into the soup, chewing slowly, she stared up at the enchanted ceiling and gazed at the snow falling over the table, the thick snowflakes floating dreamily just over the student's plates and then disappearing.

When she looked back down from the ceiling, intending to take another bite of food, she saw James sitting next to her, watching her patiently. Slightly startled, she scolded him for scaring her in her fragile state.

Apologizing, he said, "How's the healing coming along?"

"I'm a bit sore," she said, pushing around some crumbs on her emptying plate, "but alright otherwise."

"Going home for the holidays?" he asked, making friendly conversation while stealing a piece of steak from in front of her.

"Yes," she responded, stealing it back from him right before he put it in his mouth, and eating it herself

"Got any plans?" he asked again, taking another piece of food and eating it quickly before Natalie could stop him.

"No," she answered truthfully. "I'll most likely be catching up on all the homework I owe. Perhaps eat a frozen dinner."

"Your mum doesn't cook?"

"My mum won't be home," she said.

James stopped moving and stared at her as if she were crazy. "You'll be home alone on Christmas?"

"Most of the holiday I will be, actually. It's a very busy time for Muggles; my mother usually works as much as she possibly can."

For the past few years, once Natalie's mother landed the factory job, she had indeed spent her Christmas holidays alone, for the exception of Jason's few visits. This year, though, she wouldn't have that to rely on. She would spend the days doing homework and reading through textbooks, starting her studying early for finals; the nights she would spend scrounging for food and watching the television, laughing at the Muggle programs and their stupidity. It was lonesome, and she longed to go back to the castle by the end of the holiday, but she didn't mind it too much.

"You can't be alone on Christmas," James said, as if he was stating the obvious.

"I'd rather be alone in my own home than alone here," she told him, fact-like.

He was silent for a moment, thinking things inside his own mind that Natalie couldn't see, though she would admit that she was interested. When he spoke again, it was plain that he had already made a decision on the matter, and that he would not accept any thoughts from Natalie unless they agreed with his own.

"You'll spend Christmas with me and my family, then."

Though she was touched by his act of friendship, as she had never really experienced anything of that nature before, she immediately turned his offer down. "No, no, really I'll be fine on my own. I do it every year."

"Come on," he pleaded, "its loads of fun. My parents can tell you all sorts of embarrassing stories about me. And there's always a ton of food, my mum's a great cook."

"I don't want to be a bother to your parents," she started, but James cut her off.

"You wouldn't be a bother. My dad wouldn't let my mum have any more kids after they'd seen what I was like, so they love having people over. My dad plays exploding snap with all of us, it's quite fun."

Even though James hadn't said it directly, Natalie was good enough at reading between the lines to realize that the rest of the Marauders were more than likely to be spending the day at the Potter's house. If Natalie went as well, with Sirius in the same room the entire night, she knew it would be the most awkward thing for everyone in the situation.

"I can't," she told James.

"Why?" he asked, quite saddened by her refusal.

Natalie sighed, already exhausted with the conversation. "Sirius will be there, won't he?"

"Nat," he started, "if you'd just let me tell him-"

"No, James. I've told you before, I don't want him knowing," she said, her voice stern. "And your house is his, too, so it would be rude if I was there while he was."

"He won't be!" James almost yelled. "He won't be back to our house until late that night. He's going to try and make contact with his brother, though I don't see how it'll be much help. The little bugger's already ruined."

Natalie was still hesitant. James saw this and pleaded again, assuring her that it wouldn't be awkward at all, that it would only be fun and that he really wanted her to come.

"Alright, I'll go," she said, exasperated at his attempts and finally giving in.

"Good," he said, smiling at his win. "You can't apparate yet, can you?"

"I'll be able to on the 21st."

She knew how, of course, she was one of the very first people to be able to apparate during their lessons, but it was not legal for her to do so until a few days into the holiday, when her birthday would be taking place.

"Well I know where you live, Sirius took me past your house once last summer," he said, ignoring the look of utter surprise on Natalie's face, "so I'll come get you since you don't know where I live and then you can apparate back yourself whenever you want."

Satisfied with himself, he strode out of the Great Hall leaving Natalie sitting alone at the Ravenclaw table wondering what she had just gotten herself into.

The streets of London were covered in a thick covering of the whitest snow; pure like a newly hatched dove, and as quiet. It glistened in the places untouched by human interference, almost glittering in the rays of dying sunlight. Acting as a blanket, it kept the world from suffering from the below freezing temperatures and cast a peaceful silence upon the houses it surrounded. Drifting slowly, it covered everything from park benches to people's homes, making them look dream-like, as if they were just plucked out of a children's Christmas tale.

Natalie was standing on her front porch, having discretely removed the wet snow with her wand. Her birthday was a few days prior, and she found a whole new world of magic having turned the legalizing age of 17. Bundled in several layers of socks, shirts, pants, and her thickest sweater, she held a cold hand up to her nose, attempting to lessen the numbness spreading across her face. She was staring out into the distance, listening for the ever familiar pop of someone apparating close by and waiting for her friend to come collect her.

She was concentrating so intently that she hardly noticed someone walking up her drive until she saw them out of the corner of her eye when they appeared at the step below her. Jumping slightly from surprise, Natalie made eye contact with someone she was quite hoping to avoid during her holiday home.

"Natalie," came a cold voice from a face with sandy blonde hair and plain brown eyes. "It's been too long."

Jason had clearly just come from his warm home because Natalie noticed his face was not pink from cold as hers surely was. Feeling marginally self-conscious, mostly from embarrassment at the way she had ended things with him, she pulled her sweater tighter across her body, doing nothing to shield her presence from him.

"What are you doing here, Jason?" she asked, hoping he would take the hint that she didn't want him there and leave.

"Well, I saw you standing here alone and thought I'd come say hello. We do usually see each other over the holiday," he said, as if he was stating something completely obvious.

"Yes, when we were together," Natalie retorted in the same tone of voice, becoming irritated.

Jason looked at her for a moment, his mouth shut tight in a straight line that indicated the anger brewing beneath his annoyingly pale brown turtleneck. "I was hoping we'd forget about that little indiscretion on your part. But if you insist on bringing it up, I suppose we may talk about it."

Natalie was infuriated. Was Jason pretending they were still a couple? She took a lot of mistreatment from him at times, but now that he was not part of her present life anymore, she didn't feel the need to keep her thoughts to herself. She was no longer attached to him; she no longer needed to listen to his lectures about her behavior or anything else he felt the need to comment on.

"Indiscretion?" she asked, taking a step toward him, just barely a head taller as she stood on the stoop above him. "I broke it off with you. You can't just choose to ignore it. I've ended our relationship, and I did it a while ago."

"It is a mistake on your part to make such a rash decision on what will only be a temporary feeling," he said stuffily, overlooking everything Natalie had just said.

"Well it is my mistake to make, you have no choice in the matter," she told him forcefully.

Jason reached out and grabbed her wrist tightly, cutting off circulation almost immediately. Natalie tried to take a step back, attempting to pull her wrist from his grip but he was too strong. "You will do as I say, Natalie," he threatened, and was about to say something else before he was cut off by someone at the end of the driveway.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Natalie turned her head quickly and looked over Jason's shoulder to see James and Remus coming up the walkway toward her. Remus looked furious, his lightly colored brown eyes narrowed at Jason, an intense concentration on his face that reminded her of the wolf hiding inside him. James looked, if at all possible, angrier than the ferociousness seen on Remus' face. However, his eyes were on Natalie instead of the man holding her still. The two stopped a few paces before reaching Jason, both sliding their hands into their pockets where Natalie knew their wands were stored, waiting at the ready to use them if the circumstance called for it.

"Let her go," James said, his voice calm and contrasting shockingly with the viscous anger in his eyes.

Jason took in James and Remus' appearances slowly, narrowing his eyes at the fact that they were hiding their hands and turning his nose up at Remus' shabby clothing and James' messy black hair. He turned back to Natalie and sneered. "Is that him, then? The handsome dark haired boy you were seeing all summer?"

"And what if I am?" James asked, stepping forward slowly, barely noticeable, not letting Natalie answer.

She stayed silent. Jason raised his eyebrow at James and turned to face him, not letting go of his strong grip on her arm. She could feel a bruise forming quickly. "Well, congratulations then. Not many people would have stayed with someone who cheated on them for so long. It certainly says something about your character…"

James stared unwaveringly at Jason, not letting his insults affect him in the slightest. He said again, "let her go."

Looking down at his hand clenched around Natalie's wrist, he let go and ran the hand through his slicked back hair. Natalie cradled her wrist and rubbed it vigorously, trying to get feeling back to her fingers.

"We will see each other again, no doubt," Jason said to her, using a tone of voice that Natalie knew was a threatening one.

"Don't count on it," Remus chimed in, still eyeing Jason with a look of pure loathing.

Jason smoothed his shirt by running both hands down his chest and locked his hands together behind his back. Starting to walk away, he looked at James and Remus with disgust. He had to push his way through the two men as they would not move to let him through, and he walked away irritated.

When Jason was out of sight the boys dropped their intimidating faces and rushed to see if Natalie was okay. Remus rubbed her shoulder comfortingly while James grabbed a handful of icy snow and held it to her wrist.

"I'm alright, really. It's just a bit red," she said, shooing them away from her hand and looking them both in the eyes. "Thank you."

The boys both knew she was referring to them handling the situation from before. They both nodded, not wanting to be invasive by asking her any questions. Instead, James simply took her hand and turned quickly on the spot, sending the two of them through a tight, oxygen depraved flight through space and landing on the other side right outside James' house, Remus appearing next to them a second later.

James' house was big and beautiful. Located on a lonely street somewhere outside London, Natalie could see the spacious yard under the blanket of snow and wondered what it was used for when it was warm and full of lush green grass. She could picture James and Sirius flying brooms in the backyard, running into the quaint green door in the front of the lightly colored house when they became too tired.

Upon entering, Natalie was immediately bathed in warmth. There was a large fireplace in the middle of a sitting area that filled the entire house in a sleepy comfort along with the wintery smell of burning logs. As she moved deeper into James' home she also smelled the unmistakable scent of warm cider and cinnamon, hopefully meaning that James' mother was baking some sort of deliciously warm dessert.

"Mum, Dad," James called as they entered the bright and welcoming kitchen, "we're back!"

James was an impressive mix of both of his parents. His mother, smiling a rosy cheeked smile from behind a set of pans boiling in midair with different foods splashing in and out, had most obviously given James her kind and caring eyes with the addition of the necessity for glasses. She bustled over to Natalie and gave her a tight hug, saying, "Hello, dear, we've heard so much about you!"

His father was the person James got his dark hair and glasses from, though his hair was neat and parted perfectly compared to his son's untidiness. He raised his head from behind a copy of the Daily Prophet and greeted Natalie just as warmly as his wife, though without the hugging.

"Please, have a seat children, supper is almost ready," Mrs. Potter ushered James, Remus and Natalie to a large and beautiful wooden table, with the grain creating interesting lines and curves that Natalie let her eyes follow for just a moment.

The food was remarkable, far better than any cooking Natalie had ever experienced, and there was so much. It was almost comparable to a Hogwarts feast as there were so many options. Natalie filled her plate and her stomach with lamb, sausages, potatoes, beans, leafy salads, delectable sauces, rolls that she promised herself she would only have one more of, and several different kinds of casseroles until she was certain that she could no longer fit one more morsel of food into her body.

She was enjoying herself, truly having a nice time, for the first time in what seemed like ages. Once dessert and tea was served, Mrs. Potter setting cakes, cookies and trifles down across the small table in the sitting room, she delighted in listening to James and Remus sharing stories of their first term at school, chiming in occasionally when she felt her opinion would be appreciated.

When the door in the front of the house opened, Natalie didn't even remember that she wasn't in her own home, that there was one other person who lived in the house that she knew wouldn't be happy with her company.

Sirius followed the voices into the sitting room, looking weather worn and tired. His face lightened when he saw the Potters and Remus and started taking off his heavy jacket before he noticed Natalie sitting in the arm chair beside him.

She was avoiding everyone's eye contact, a wave of blood rushing up to her cheeks, thoroughly embarrassed. Certainly Sirius was close enough with James' parents to have told them all about their relationship. What were they thinking at that moment? She thought she had made a nice impression on them, but of course they would be more protective over someone they thought of as their own son. Natalie put down her half empty glass of tea quietly and got out of her chair, making her way towards the coat closet to retrieve her things.

There was whispering from the other room. She heard scuffling of shoes and Sirius saying, "What is she doing here?" It was almost a guarantee that James would try to get her to stay. Wanting to avoid an awkward confrontation, she exited the house quietly, pulling the door closed behind her and disapparated on the front porch.

The snow under her feet muffled the sound of her hitting the ground, sending some of it flying up into the air. It created a dream-like look of glistening air around Natalie, but she did not stay in one spot to watch it fall back to the ground again.

Natalie had apparated a block from her home, knowing full well that Jason would be looking for any sign of her. She started walking in the direction of her house, her feet pounding the snow under her into flat piles of what would become ice in a few hours' time. The wind was picking up, sending her long locks of blonde hair flying in every direction. As she tried to pull it all back into one place to attempt to get her hood up she heard someone behind her.

"Hey!"

It was hard to hear over the oncoming blizzard, but the noise was unmistakably another human. Natalie turned around and, to her great surprise, saw Sirius' dark head bounding toward her, his curls matted down under the wet snow falling ever harder over both of their heads.

He stopped at arm's length in front of her, his brows furrowed in an emotion that Natalie found hard to pinpoint. She had her arms wrapped tightly around herself, sheltering her as much as she could from the thick snowflakes falling around her. Sirius stood with his hands at his sides, not caring for even a second about the cold.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he said loudly, making sure he was heard over the whistling wind.

Natalie was taken aback. It took her a moment to get her vocal cords to work, but when she did, she retorted, "James promised he wouldn't say anything."

"Well I'm glad he did. You should have told me," Sirius yelled, leaving his sentence without a real ending.

Not knowing what to say, her mind reeling, she could do nothing more than turn around and continue walking in the direction of her home, her hair whipping her face in the wild winds. She felt a hand on her wrist turning her around, the same one that Jason had harassed earlier. Sirius' touch was gentle, however, and Natalie could feel the warmth of his fingers despite the bitter cold that was introducing itself into the atmosphere. She looked up into his eyes, the eyes she constantly wished she could dive into and feel safe and loved forever.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, desperation on his face, wanting to know the answer to everything he was questioning in his mind.

"You made your decision without me telling you anything."

Sirius looked at her, taking in everything about her appearance at that moment. Her blonde hair flying around her face, almost ethereal but still beautiful, her skin, pale and flushed from the cold, her blue eyes boring into his own. He wanted to hold her in his arms, to keep her warm and to feel her heart beat in time with his. Before he had formulated a sentence in his mind, his lips said, "I made the wrong one."

Natalie's breath caught in her throat. Though her skin was cold, her insides were boiling. She wasted no time, not bothering to give Sirius any answer to his words. She stepped close to him and hoisted herself onto her toes, giving her enough height to wrap her hand around the back of his neck and pull his lips onto hers. She could feel him smile and kiss her back eagerly, the both of them realizing how much they missed the other's touch.

They ran back to Natalie's empty house, not bothering to hide themselves from the potential of Jason's prying eyes. As she locked the door behind them, Sirius pulled her into his arms, not wanting to waste one moment without her close to him. They were a sight to see, damp from the falling snow, bundled in a hodgepodge of their warmest clothing, but neither of them could spare a moment to care about their appearances.

They wanted nothing more than to be in each other's embrace. Natalie's hands found Sirius' hair, his cheeks, the zipper of his jacket. Soon enough the two of them were in their normal clothing, drenched in sweat from the heat of the house mixed with the heat from their layers mixed with the heat from each other. Their embrace was rough, Sirius holding Natalie to him by the small of her back, his hand pressing hard into her skin and Natalie making sure Sirius wasn't able to leave her lips by holding his head in place with her hand on the back of his neck. Rough, but adoring.

Natalie and Sirius were lost in each other, the white wonderland of the outside world an unimportant detail of their time together. Not even when they found the staircase and climbed their way to the second floor did they break contact with each other. The latch catching as a door was locked, the creak of a bedspring, and two became one for the first time.


	15. Chapter 15

Time is a fickle beast. When awaiting something dreadful it seems to creep by slowly, agonizingly, but when simply content with the world it is the complete opposite, flying at break-neck speeds. It was almost as if in a blink of an eye that the winter holidays had just finished when, all of a sudden, it was only a few weeks before the end of the school year altogether.

Natalie and Sirius were in love. No, 'in love' couldn't possibly express their feelings for each other. They were obsessed, eye-gazing, always-snogging, wait-for-each-other-after-class in love, and that barely scratched the surface. The two of them spent every waking moment that wasn't spent in class or sleeping together; where one was, rest assured that the other wouldn't be far behind.

And while a large majority of the time was indeed spend snogging in the broom closet, or an empty hallway or classroom, or sometimes even the end of the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall (which was promptly stopped by whichever teacher was nearest), Natalie and Sirius talked as well. About everything, really. Classes, friends, family, the future.

The future was something Sirius loved to talk about. He would ramble on for what seemed like forever, and about everything he had ever wanted or dreamed about having in his life after Hogwarts.

"I want to be an Auror, but I don't think I've got the marks for it," he told Natalie one beautiful May afternoon as they sat on the steps of a secluded exit of the castle.

The grounds were calm and quiet, and happy. The grass was back to its vibrant green color, which was inviting after the cold and dreary winter. Leaves were back on the branches of trees, giving homes to birds and critters alike; the rustling sound of leaves and creatures in the wind was like music to Natalie's ears as her hair fluttered softly around her shoulders.

"I'm sure you'll get wonderful marks," she responded, not paying any close attention to the conversation.

"If I do it'll only be because I've copied off of everyone else," he said gloomily. "What do you want to do, anyway?"

She leaned back on her elbows and let her head fall back, her hair so long that it brushed the steps. "Journalism, I think. Or something like it. McGonagall gave me some reading material and a few contacts at the Daily Prophet. She says I'd be a good fit, that I've got a bit to offer them."

"Well that's great!" Sirius exclaimed, overly excited in Natalie's opinion. "We can get flats in London, since that's where the Ministry and the Prophet both are. Plus," he said, scooting closer to her and putting an arm around her waist, "we'd be close to each other. Perhaps we'd be neighbors?"

Natalie giggled and let her body relax next to his. "We're practically neighbors right now, there wouldn't be much of a difference."

He rolled his eyes. "Please, we'd have so much more freedom. You'll be able to sleep over at my place and you definitely can't do that here."

"Who says I'll be sleeping at your place?" she questioned, jokingly. "I'll have my own flat with my own perfectly good bed."

Sirius tickled her with the hand holding her waist, knowing she was teasing him. "Very funny."

Final exams were to be held the second to last week of school. Natalie had been studying extremely hard, knowing that to be successful outside of Hogwarts, she needed top marks in every subject that she elected to take during her last year. After speaking to McGonagall about her career aspirations, it was very clear that, upon passing her subjects with flying colors, that there would be no reason at all that the Daily Prophet wouldn't hire her.

She had always been very good at spells, from both Charms and Defense Against the Dark Arts, though that had next to nothing to do with journalism. No, it would be her prowess at writing, creating a story with just the tip of a quill and her mind. She would be submitting her very best essays to the Daily Prophet Editor in Chief after her graduation, in addition to her many complex star charts, to show that she was able to write a good article about anything and everything.

The Friday before the last weekend at school was the last day of testing. Everything had gone according to plan for Natalie and her friends, thus putting them all in a very good mood after their Care of Magical Creatures exam. As they made their way, slowly, up to the castle for a few hours break before their last exam, Natalie noticed that Sirius and James had fallen behind. They had their heads bowed low and were whispering, as if not wanting the others to hear them.

Natalie stopped, intending to walk back to where they were, but Sirius noticed her lack of movement. Muttering something to James, they both quickened their pace and took their places again with the rest of the group. Natalie looked up suspiciously at Sirius as he took her hand in his, walking next to her as they reached the top of the hill and saw the steps to the Entrance Hall.

"Later, I promise," he said quietly, with sincerity in his eyes.

Though she was still wary, she made herself forget about it for the time being.

The meals had been amplified times a thousand during the testing week, so that the staff was able to ensure that the students were getting plenty of food and drink before, in between, and after their exams. There had been large plates of eggs and morning sausages, vats of porridge, jugs of milk and juices, and towers of fresh fruit for breakfast every morning. Lunch consisted of piles of cold meats for sandwiches, delicious cooked, steamed, grilled and raw vegetables of every variety imaginable, bowls upon bowls of piping hot soups and a thousand different kinds of bread to dip in them. But supper was the most exciting, as everyone, including teachers, were starved from exerting so much brain power during the day. There were meats, hearty and lean, seasoned and marinated, baked, grilled, broiled, diced, chopped, fileted. There was seafood galore; beautiful cuts of salmon, halibut, and tuna, next to plates of shrimp, big and small, on skewers adorned with onions and peppers. Any type of potato one could think of, mashed, boiled, baked, julienned, sautéed, was on the tables, which almost seemed to creak under the weight of so much food.

And the dessert was to die for. Pies in every color, cakes in every size, giant bowls of ice creams, tiers of tarts and chocolates made it so every student forced themselves to make room for just one more bite.

As was usual over the past week, Natalie left the Great Hall stuffed and sleepy. She was on her way to the Ravenclaw common room to do a bit of last minute studying for her Defense Against the Dark Arts exam when Sirius caught up to her and pulled her into an empty classroom. The world outside the castle was starting to get darker as the hours dragged on. The classroom was getting steadily darker as well, as the oil lamps had all been extinguished by the last user.

"Sorry about earlier," Sirius started, closing the door behind him and turning to face Natalie.

"What were you two whispering about?" she asked, not caring if it was a secret.

"Well that's why I brought you in here. It involves you. And the others, Remus and Peter, that is."

"What, are you planning a surprise party?" she joked, finding a seat and getting comfortable.

Sirius chuckled and pushed a hand through his hair, sending loose, dark curls falling all over his head. "No, it's a bit more serious than that."

He moved closer to her end of the classroom and sat down in an empty chair next to her. Taking another deep breath, he started.

"We're graduating in a week," he said, looking at her. "We have to go out into the world and start our lives in only a few days."

Natalie's brows furrowed together in confusion. Yes, she knew all of these things, what was his point? She knew he wanted to live close to each other, but…he couldn't possibly be trying to suggest something more?

"Your point?" she asked, trying not to be sarcastic.

Without rolling his eyes or making a joke, Sirius replied, "James and I aren't going to become Aurors."

Natalie sighed in exhaustion. "I'm sure you did fine on your exams and will be able to get a job. There's no need to be so down on yourself."

This time Sirius did roll his eyes and grabbed Natalie's hand to regain her attention. "That's not what I'm talking about. We, James and I, heard another seventh year talking about this…I dunno, secret organization, I suppose. We want to join."

"What kind of 'secret organization'? Like a cult?" she asked in a mocking tone.

"No. The kind that's fighting those people that keep making headlines."

Emotions hit Natalie like a speeding train. She blinked, trying to make sense of his last comment. There had been a group of people that had been on the front page of the Daily Prophet for months and months, a group that was growing larger and causing more damage day to day.

Sirius interrupted her thoughts. "It's getting worse. They're gaining more people and getting stronger. There are way more killings now than there were at the beginning of the year. They need to be stopped."

"By you?" she asked, suddenly overcome with many things; fear, sadness, confusion, anger.

"Not only me," he said, but Natalie got out of her seat and started across the room. He jumped up and touched her arm lightly, causing her to turn around and look into his eyes. "Listen to me, Nat. It's all very dark and quiet but from what I've found out, Dumbledore runs the thing. He's got almost twenty people recruited so far and he's looking for anyone of age that wants to fight and make a difference."

Natalie took everything in while staring into those gray pools that somehow kept her calm. He sat her back down and continued talking.

"James is trying to convince Lily to go, and Peter will say yes the moment we ask. But I want you to come with as well. It doesn't pay, so we'll have to get small jobs, but we could stop these people."

She simply stared at him, unable to talk, to make coherent thoughts, to do anything but remind herself to breath. In a way, she was right, he was suggesting much more than moving within a block radius of each other.

"Think about it. Take as much time as you need, really," he added, knowing that the last time he told her to think about things it ended in them breaking up.

He lifted himself out of the seat, kissed her lightly on the forehead and left her alone in the dark, cold classroom.

Natalie sat in the classroom until she noticed it was time for her final exam. Walking through the hallways felt like a blur. Her body was on autopilot and she didn't come to until she was halfway through the written part of her Defense Against the Dark Arts exam. She tried her hardest to recollect any and all information she learned from the past year, but the only thing she could think about was Sirius' proposition.

This group of people were indeed growing larger. Though the public couldn't tell exactly, it seemed as though their ranks had grown to fifty, or possibly more. Their leader was a then nameless, faceless being. And even though no one knew what he looked like or who he was, everyone was certain that he was truly evil.

The amount of attacks on Muggles and Muggleborns had significantly increased over the months that these people had become active. It was apparent that their main goal was to cleanse the wizarding population of anything they deemed impure. Even half-bloods, people who were born to a wizard parent and a Muggle parent, were often seen as not good enough or even as blood traitors if they decided to make friends with the wrong people.

As witches and wizards, this group was able to wreak havoc like nothing anyone had ever seen. Yes, there had been dark wizards to run the earth before then, but a group as massive as this had never gone so far. The Daily Prophet had a headline on their front page almost every day having to do with the damage they were inflicting; buildings falling to the ground in a heap of dust with no survivors, homes of wizarding families going up in flames with no survivors, people being attacked on their way home from work with no survivors.

Natalie saw every headline, every article, every photograph. Though she was under the protection of the staff and security at Hogwarts, she knew that things would be vastly different once she was out on her own. The future frightened her beyond comprehension. And now, with Sirius wanting her to do something so incredibly risky, she could hardly stop herself from shaking with fear in the middle of the night.

He hadn't brought it up again, which gave Natalie much more time to think about her decision. With the stress of exams over, everyone's spirits were much higher. It seemed, as far as Natalie could tell, that Lily Evans had agreed to go with them to this secret society, as she and James' new relationship was closer than ever.

Natalie and Sirius', however, was becoming more distant. She couldn't help it; no matter how hard she tried to ignore her thoughts for just a little while as she spent time with Sirius, she couldn't stop them from rushing into her head and flooding her brain.

Two days before the graduation ceremony for seventh years was to be held, Natalie was asked to meet Professor McGonagall in her office. As she walked the halls to the office, Natalie's thoughts were not on Sirius and his offer for the first time in almost a week. She was instead wondering what McGonagall could need to see her for. Perhaps she was going to give Natalie a few names to contact at the Daily Prophet.

Entering McGonagall's office after a few soft knocks and a 'come in,' Natalie sat herself opposite the professor and her desk, folding her hands over her lap and waiting patiently for the reason she was told to come.

"Ms. Hill," McGonagall started, "I have the results from your exams."

McGonagall was a straight-to-the-point type of woman. She felt no need for niceties when something important was at hand. Natalie nodded, giving her whole and undivided attention to her professor.

"You did well on all but your last exam," she told Natalie in a gentle voice, perhaps hoping to lessen the blow she was about to deliver. "However, you nearly failed your Defense Against the Dark Arts written essay."

Natalie was speechless. How could she have failed? She studied so hard for all of her exams, it was impossible that she could have done so badly. Though, she thought to herself, that one was the exam right after Sirius had talked to her…

"Unfortunately, the Daily Prophet requires their staff to have achieved all of their NEWTs with superior marks. I will not be able to refer you to them for a job," McGonagall said, breaking into Natalie's thoughts in the nastiest way.

Once again, her whole world was a blur. She nearly failed her exam. She wouldn't get hired by the Daily Prophet. How did she get to her dorm? Natalie's head was swimming. What would she do now? Perhaps going with Sirius was the best thing to do, now that she had no prospective jobs waiting for her in the real world. Perhaps risking her life to fight bad guys and evil do-ers was what she was destined to do, especially now that she wasn't even good enough to pass an exam…

"Are you alright? I haven't seen you for almost the whole week."

"Yeah, I'm fine," Natalie said, not bothering to hide her defeated attitude.

Sirius sat down next to her in the Great Hall. The school was enjoying their last breakfast at the castle, as the Hogwarts Express would be taking everyone home the next day. Many of the seventh years were twittering excitedly, as they would be receiving their proof of graduation that night during the small ceremony that only seventh years and the staff were invited to.

"Nat, have you thought about what I said last week at all? We leave tomorrow," Sirius asked, keeping his voice low so as not to attract unwanted attention.

Natalie let out the breath she had been holding while he spoke. "Yes, I have."

"And?" he was clearly excited.

She hesitated. She had been dreading this moment since she had made her official decision only a day prior. The thought of putting her life on the line for something that seemed almost futile didn't make any sense to her. No, she would keep her head low and do her best to survive the terrible world that awaited her outside the doors of the Entrance Hall. But Natalie still didn't want to see the look on Sirius' face when she let him down.

"I'm not going to go," she said quietly, too sad to look at him.

Silence met her, yet still she did not move her eyes to his. She knew that he was thinking of something to say. She spoke again, not giving him a chance to voice his yet-to-be-formulated thoughts.

Quietly, she told him, "McGonagall gave me an excellent recommendation to the Prophet. They sent me an owl as soon as they got her letter. They want me to start working for them as soon as next week."

Natalie knew that she was lying through her teeth and she felt horrible about it, worse than the dirt that had no right to be stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe. She had thought about it all week and had finally decided that lying to Sirius and her friends was easier than actually telling them the truth. Had she told Sirius the truth, he would have tried to convince her that she was silly for being so frightened, that nothing bad would happen to her. She knew these things to be lies, though. No one would be able to protect her if she chose to fight.

Sirius' disappointment faded slightly at her lie. Instead of thinking that she didn't want to go with him or be with him at all he was happy that she was able to get such a good job so quickly.

"I'm sorry," Natalie whispered, not knowing what was happening inside Sirius' head.

He let a small, almost sad, smile play on his lips. "Can we still be neighbors?"

The Hogwarts grounds were abuzz with countless sources of commotion. An early, spring sun bathed the grounds in pale yellows and oranges, lighting the student's paths to the carriages that would carry them into Hogsmeade village and finally to the Hogwarts Express, to be taken home once again. For some, the train will be waiting to take them back to school again in the fall. Others will never have the pleasure to ride it again, having graduated the night before.

Sirius, James, Remus, Peter and Lily had already arrived in Hogsmeade, the pleasant village alive and moving at such an early hour. No shops were open quite yet, but that didn't stop some of the younger students from looking into the windows, leaning so closely that their noses left smudge marks on the glass.

Natalie had caught the carriage behind her friends, as there wasn't quite enough room for six full grown bodies to fit into one. Really, there wasn't even room for five, but Peter wouldn't let himself be booted out, so Lily sat on James' lap, much to James' satisfaction.

The others waited for Natalie to arrive towards the main road that would lead to the train. They waited a few minutes, craning their necks over the crowd to try and catch a glimpse of their friends white blonde hair.

"Wasn't she just behind us?" James asked, jokingly attempting to climb onto Peter's shoulders with the excuse that he needed to see farther.

"I thought so," Remus said, with the common look of concern that was ever etched onto his pale face.

Natalie watched her friends search for her from behind a building, hidden in the morning shadows. She had decided just after graduation the night before what she would need to do to be able to leave the next morning.

She knew Sirius was really going to join the secret order that he had talked to her about. She knew that James, Remus and Peter would follow him anywhere, no matter the cost, no questions asked. She knew that as long as she stayed in contact with any of them, that she would be worse off from it.

Anyone who had read the Prophet within the last year knew what kind of people were lurking out in the wizarding world. Those people could kill an entire family without even thinking twice about it, they could tear down entire Muggle cities without flinching. Being Muggleborn herself, Natalie was already in a more dangerous position. She couldn't possibly fight against the war that was surely brewing, just waiting to blow up fully. She couldn't possibly be around Sirius or her friends while they were fighting against such a terrifying force.

And that's when she came to her decision. It was a difficult one, one that tore her up inside and one that she had second, third, and fourth thoughts about. However, it was the one that she knew she had to make. It was the decision that could potentially keep her alive.

Sirius was looking around the crowd for her as well. As silent, glassy tears started rolling down Natalie's cheeks, she saw the boy she loved look down at the ground, defeated.

Clearing his throat, he said, "She probably just got on the train before we caught her. Come on."

The others followed him towards the train, not thinking twice about why they really couldn't find Natalie. Right as they were about to turn the corner, Sirius looked back one more time and Natalie could see the pain and anguish on his face, for he knew then that she had been lying the afternoon before. He knew that she had no job lined up, that they wouldn't be neighbors, that he might never see her again.

Before she could change her mind and run out to hug him, kiss him, run her hands through his hair one more time, she pulled her wand from her back pocket and turned sharply on the spot.


End file.
